Cleanliness Guaranteed*

Link to article: Cleanliness Guaranteed*.

/*cleanliness-guaranteed-hub*/
@import url("https://nu-scptheme.github.io/Black-Highlighter/stable/styles/normalize.min.css");
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Oswald:wght@200..700&display=swap');
@import url("https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Bebas+Neue&family=Oswald:wght@200..700&family=Roboto+Mono:ital,wght@0,100..700;1,100..700&display=swap");
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Jost:ital,wght@0,100..900;1,100..900&display=swap');

.ad-container {
  position: absolute;
  top: 50px;

  display: flex;
  flex-direction: column;
  gap: 15px;
  z-index: -1;
}

.ad-container.left { left: 10px; }
.ad-container.right { right: 10px; }

.ad {
  width: calc(50vw - 525px);
  padding: 20px;
}

ul {
  padding-inline-start: 20px;
}

.close-menu {
  display: none;
}

.page-rate-widget-box {
  color: white;
  background-color: black;
  display: inline-block;
}

div.buttons input {
  border: 1px solid black;
  background-color: #eeeeee;
  margin: 3px;
  padding: 3px;
}

table.wiki-content-table table,
table.wiki-content-table th,
table.wiki-content-table td {
  border: 1px solid #555;
}

table.wiki-content-table th,
table.wiki-content-table td {
  padding: 3px;
}

#side-bar .side-block {
  width: 100%;
}

.side-block.media:nth-child(1) {
  display: flex;
  justify-content: center;
}

#header {
  background-image: url("https://scp-sandbox-3.wdfiles.com/local--files/theme%3Acleaning-services/logo.png");
  background-size: contain;
  background-repeat: no-repeat;
  background-position-x: 100%;
  padding: 5px;
  background-color: #eeeedd;
  border-bottom: 3px solid black;
}

#top-bar :is(.top-bar, .mobile-top-bar) > ul {
  position: relative;
  flex-wrap: wrap;
  
  > li > ul {
    display: none;
    position: absolute;
  }
  
  > li:hover > ul {
    display: flex;
    flex-direction: column;
    background-color: white;
    border: 1px solid black;
    z-index: 2;
    
    > li {
      border: none;
      position: static;
    } 
  }
}

#main-content {
  margin: 5px;
}

#footer {
  margin: 5px;
}

#header h1::before {
  content: "SAFE CLEANUP PROFESSIONALS";
  color: #7c0a02;;
  font-family: "Oswald", sans-serif;
  font-weight: bold;
}
#header h2::before {
  content: "Sanitize, Cleanse, Polish™";
  color: #3d7b58;
  font-family: "Oswald", sans-serif;
  font-weight: bold;
}

#header h1 {
  color: #00000000;
  font-size: min(48px, 5vw);
  height: 1lh;
}
#header h2 {
  color: #00000000;
  font-size: 24px;
  height: 1lh;
}

html, body {
  margin: 0;
  min-height: 100%;
  font-family: Arial, sans-serif;
}

body {
  background: repeating-linear-gradient(
    45deg,
    black 0,
    black 25px,
    #333300 25px,
    #333300 50px
  );
}


#skrollr-body { 
  width: min(900px, 90%); 
  border: 1px solid black; 
  background-color: #cccccc; 
  margin: auto; 
  margin-top: 50px; 
  margin-bottom: 150px; 
  z-index: 100;
  box-shadow: 0 0 0 9999px rgba(0,0,0,0.3);
}

#content-wrap {
  display: flex;
}

#side-bar {
  max-height: 100vh;
  flex-direction: column;
  display: flex;
  border: 1px solid black;
  position: fixed;
  z-index: 10;
  width: 30%;
  background-color: #bbbbbb;
  top: 0;
  left: -26%;
  transition: left 0.25s;
  max-height: 100vh;
  overflow: auto;
  .heading {
    border-bottom: none;
    border-top: 1px solid black;
  }
}

#side-bar:hover {
  left: 0;
  overflow: auto;
}

a,
#top-bar a {
  color: #873e23;
}

:root #top-bar a {
  border: none;
}

a:visited {
  color: #875823;
}

hr {
  display: block;
  border: 0;
  border-top: 1px solid black;
  margin: 1.5em 50px;
  height: 0;
}


#search-top-box {
  margin-bottom: 5px;
}

#search-top-box-form {
  display: flex;
  font-size: 18px;
}

#search-top-box-form input {
  background-color: white;
  border: 1px solid black;
  margin-right: 10px;
}

#top-bar {
  font-size: 18px;
}

#top-bar .top-bar ul {
  display: flex;
  list-style: none;
}

#top-bar .top-bar ul li {
  padding-right: 5px;
  margin-left: 5px;
  border-right: 1px solid black;
}

#top-bar .top-bar ul li:nth-child(1) {
  margin-left: 0;
}

#top-bar .mobile-top-bar > ul {
  display: none;
}

#login-status {
  display: flex;
}

#account-options {
  display: block !important;
}

#account-topbutton {
  display: none;
}

#account-options ul {
  display: flex;
  flex-wrap: wrap;
}

#account-options ul li {
  padding-right: 5px;
  margin-left: 5px;
  border-right: 1px solid black;
}

#my-account {
  white-space: nowrap;
}

.columns {
  display: flex;
  justify-content: stretch;
}

.columns > div {
  border: 1px solid black;
  padding: 5px;
}

.hovertip {
  width: 20%;
  background-color: white;
}

.gay {
  position: relative;
  z-index: 1;
  animation-name: rainbow;
  animation-duration: 15s;
  animation-iteration-count: infinite;
  transform: rotate(4deg);
}

@keyframes rainbow {
  0% {
    color: red;
  }

  13% {
    color: orange;
  }

  25% {
    color: yellow;
  }

  38% {
    color: lime;
  }

  50% {
    color: cyan;
  }

  63% {
    color: royalblue;
  }

  75% {
    color: darkviolet;
  }

  83% {
    color: magenta;
  }

  100% {
    color: red;
  }
}

#wd-editor-toolbar-panel ul {
  display: flex;
  flex-wrap: wrap;
  list-style: none;
}

#wd-editor-toolbar-panel li {
  margin: 3px 10px;
}

.owindow {
  background-color: white;
}

.yui-nav {
  border-bottom: 1px solid black;
}

:root .yui-nav li {
  background-color: #dddddd;
  padding: 5px;
  border: 1px solid black;
}

.yui-nav li.selected {
  background-color: black;
  color: white;
}
.yui-navset li,
:root .yui-navset a,
:root .yui-navset em {
  border: none;
}

:root .yui-navset li {
  border-left: 1px solid black;
}

.yui-navset li:nth-child(1) {
  border: none;
}

:root .yui-nav {
  border: none;
}

:root .yui-content {
  border: 1px solid black;
  padding: 5px;
  background-color: #eaeaea;
}

#page-title {
  display: none;
}

#edit-page-textarea {
  background-color: white;
}


  .open-menu {
     top: 0;
     left: 0;
     width: 80px;
     height: 50px;
     position: fixed;
     display: block;
     z-index: 3;
     * {
       margin: 0;
       padding: 0;
       display: block;
       width: 100%;
       height: 100%;
     }
   }

  :root:root #side-bar .close-menu {
    z-index: -1;
    position: absolute;
    top: 0;
    left: 0;
    width: 100vw;
    height: 100vh;
    background-color: #00000022;
  }

  :root:root #side-bar {
    transform-origin: top left;
    transform: scale(0.25, 0.07);
    transition: transform 0.5s, width 1s;
    transition-timing-function: linear;
    left: 0;
    pointer-events: none;
    width: min(50%, 400px);
  }

  :root:root #side-bar:target {
    transform: scale(1);
    pointer-events: all;
    width: min(50.01%, 400px);

    a {
      pointer-events: all;
    }
  
    .close-menu { display: none; }
  }


@keyframes ad-show-hide {
  0% { transform: scaleY(0); height: 0; }
  
  1%, 13.285% {
    height: 100%;
    transform: scaleY(1);
  }

  14.285%, 100% {
    height: 0;
    transform: scaleY(0);
  }
}

:root {
  --ad-anim-duration: 120s;
  --ad-anim-count: 7;
}

/* move sidebar to top */
@media screen and (max-width: 1280px) {
 :root .ad {
 width: calc(100% - 50px);
   margin: 0 auto;
   animation: ad-show-hide var(--ad-anim-duration) infinite;
   animation-delay: calc(var(--ad-index) * var(--ad-anim-duration) / var(--ad-anim-count));
   animation-fill-mode: both;
   position: absolute;
   min-height: 250px !important;
   display: flex;
   flex-direction: column;
   justify-content: center;
   top: 0;
   left: 0;
 }

  .ad-container.left > div:nth-child(1) {
    --ad-index: 0;
    font-size: 150%; 
  }
  .ad-container.left > div:nth-child(2) {
    --ad-index: 1;
    font-size: 110%; 
  }
  .ad-container.left > div:nth-child(3) {
    --ad-index: 2;
    font-size: 110%; 
  }
  .ad-container.left > div:nth-child(4) {
    --ad-index: 3;
    font-size: 110%; 
  }

  .ad-container.right > div:nth-child(1) {
    --ad-index: 4;
  }
  .ad-container.right > div:nth-child(2) {
    --ad-index: 5;
  }
  .ad-container.right > div:nth-child(3) {
    --ad-index: 6;
  }
}

/* Hide ads on small screens */

@media (max-width: 1280px) {
  :root .ad-container { 
    position: relative;
    z-index: 2;
    top: 0;
    left: 0;
    right: 0;
    bottom: 0;
  }

  .ad-container.right {
    height: 250px;
    margin-bottom: 50px;
  }
}

/* Mobile devices */
@media screen and (max-width: 768px) {

  .ad {

  font-size: 75%;
  }

  #header {
    padding-left: 20px;
    > * {
      padding-left: 0;
    }
  }

  .menu-item {
    display: inline-block;
    margin-right: 20px;
  }

  :root:root #top-bar .mobile-top-bar {
    display: block;

    > ul {
      display: none;
    }
  }

  #content-wrap {
    flex-direction: column;
  }

  .columns {
    flex-direction: column;
    align-items: stretch;
  }

  #header h1 {
    font-size: min(24px, 5vw);
  }

  #header h2 {
    font-size: min(18px, 7vw);
  }

  #search-top-box-form input {
    margin-right: 0;
    margin-bottom: 10px;
  }

  .columns > div {
    width: 100%;
    margin-bottom: 10px;
  }

  .hovertip {
    width: 100%;
  }

  #skrollr-body {
    width: 100%;
    margin-top: 150px;
    margin-bottom: 20px;
  }

  .gay {
    font-size: 14px;
  }
}

.page-source {
  padding: 10px;
  border: 1px solid black;
  font-family: monospace;
}

#page-options-bottom-2 {
  margin-bottom: 20px;
}

#edit-page-comments {
  background-color: white;
}

#page-content {
  margin-bottom: 30px;
}

.fanart-tab img {
    max-width: 100%;
}

.profile {
    border-radius: 5px;
    width: 150px;
}

.page-rate-widget-box > * {
  padding-right: 4px;
}

.close-sidebar {
  display: none;
}

:root:has(#side-bar:target) .close-sidebar {
  display: block;
  background-color: #0005;
  position: fixed;
  top: 0;
  left: 0;
  width: 100vw;
  height: 100vh;
}

```
font-size: 24px
```

font-size: 48px; width: 100%; text-align: center; filter: drop-shadow(3px 3px 0 black);

```
font-size: 10px
```

background-color: #f9f4ec; border: 3px solid #7a4434;

background-color: #111111; color: white; font-family: Times New Roman; box-shadow: 0 0 5px white;

color: #FF3333; font-size: 125%; font-family: Helvetica;

background-color: #fff5f9; font-family: Trebuchet MS;

color: #e00661; font-size: 200%; font-family: Brush Script MT, serif;

background: radial-gradient(circle, black, #494949); color: white; font-family: Georgia; border: 1px solid white;

font-size: 125%; font-weight: bold; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';

background-color: #19213d; color: white; font-family:

background-color: black; color: limegreen; font-family: Verdana; border: 2px solid white;

```
color: lime;
```
```
background-color: #dee0f4;
```

font-size: 200%; font-family: Impact; color: #1861ba;

```
font-weight: bold; color: #2018ba;
```

font-size: 200%; font-family: Impact; color: #1861ba;

float: right; width: 25%; align: margin-right: 100px; transform: rotate(3deg); box-shadow: 2px 2px 5px black; aspect-ratio: 3 / 2; object-fit: cover; object-position: center;

border: 1px solid black; font-family: monospace;

```
margin: auto; text-align: center;
```
```
font-size: 150%; font-weight: bold;
```

```
close-sidebar
```
```
gay
```
```
ad-container
```
```
left
```
```
ad
```
```
ad
```
```
ad
```
```
ad
```
```
ad-container
```
```
right
```
```
ad
```
```
ad
```
```
ad
```
```
fanart-tab
```

=====
[[include component:preview
text=Dial 555-605-CLEANUP and we’ll be there in a lick of a dime! Once we're done, you can rest easy, because we promise… CLEANLINESS GUARANTEED*
]]
=====

[[module css]]
/*cleanliness-guaranteed-hub*/
@import url("https://nu-scptheme.github.io/Black-Highlighter/stable/styles/normalize.min.css");
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Oswald:wght@200..700&display=swap');
@import url("https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Bebas+Neue&family=Oswald:wght@200..700&family=Roboto+Mono:ital,wght@0,100..700;1,100..700&display=swap");
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Jost:ital,wght@0,100..900;1,100..900&display=swap');

.ad-container {
  position: absolute;
  top: 50px;

  display: flex;
  flex-direction: column;
  gap: 15px;
  z-index: -1;
}

.ad-container.left { left: 10px; }
.ad-container.right { right: 10px; }

.ad {
  width: calc(50vw - 525px);
  padding: 20px;
}

ul {
  padding-inline-start: 20px;
}

.close-menu {
  display: none;
}

.page-rate-widget-box {
  color: white;
  background-color: black;
  display: inline-block;
}

div.buttons input {
  border: 1px solid black;
  background-color: #eeeeee;
  margin: 3px;
  padding: 3px;
}

table.wiki-content-table table,
table.wiki-content-table th,
table.wiki-content-table td {
  border: 1px solid #555;
}

table.wiki-content-table th,
table.wiki-content-table td {
  padding: 3px;
}

#side-bar .side-block {
  width: 100%;
}

.side-block.media:nth-child(1) {
  display: flex;
  justify-content: center;
}

#header {
  background-image: url("https://scp-sandbox-3.wdfiles.com/local--files/theme%3Acleaning-services/logo.png");
  background-size: contain;
  background-repeat: no-repeat;
  background-position-x: 100%;
  padding: 5px;
  background-color: #eeeedd;
  border-bottom: 3px solid black;
}

#top-bar :is(.top-bar, .mobile-top-bar) > ul {
  position: relative;
  flex-wrap: wrap;
  
  > li > ul {
    display: none;
    position: absolute;
  }
  
  > li:hover > ul {
    display: flex;
    flex-direction: column;
    background-color: white;
    border: 1px solid black;
    z-index: 2;
    
    > li {
      border: none;
      position: static;
    } 
  }
}

#main-content {
  margin: 5px;
}

#footer {
  margin: 5px;
}

#header h1::before {
  content: "SAFE CLEANUP PROFESSIONALS";
  color: #7c0a02;;
  font-family: "Oswald", sans-serif;
  font-weight: bold;
}
#header h2::before {
  content: "Sanitize, Cleanse, Polish™";
  color: #3d7b58;
  font-family: "Oswald", sans-serif;
  font-weight: bold;
}

#header h1 {
  color: #00000000;
  font-size: min(48px, 5vw);
  height: 1lh;
}
#header h2 {
  color: #00000000;
  font-size: 24px;
  height: 1lh;
}

html, body {
  margin: 0;
  min-height: 100%;
  font-family: Arial, sans-serif;
}

body {
  background: repeating-linear-gradient(
    45deg,
    black 0,
    black 25px,
    #333300 25px,
    #333300 50px
  );
}


#skrollr-body { 
  width: min(900px, 90%); 
  border: 1px solid black; 
  background-color: #cccccc; 
  margin: auto; 
  margin-top: 50px; 
  margin-bottom: 150px; 
  z-index: 100;
  box-shadow: 0 0 0 9999px rgba(0,0,0,0.3);
}

#content-wrap {
  display: flex;
}

#side-bar {
  max-height: 100vh;
  flex-direction: column;
  display: flex;
  border: 1px solid black;
  position: fixed;
  z-index: 10;
  width: 30%;
  background-color: #bbbbbb;
  top: 0;
  left: -26%;
  transition: left 0.25s;
  max-height: 100vh;
  overflow: auto;
  .heading {
    border-bottom: none;
    border-top: 1px solid black;
  }
}

#side-bar:hover {
  left: 0;
  overflow: auto;
}

a,
#top-bar a {
  color: #873e23;
}

:root #top-bar a {
  border: none;
}

a:visited {
  color: #875823;
}

hr {
  display: block;
  border: 0;
  border-top: 1px solid black;
  margin: 1.5em 50px;
  height: 0;
}


#search-top-box {
  margin-bottom: 5px;
}

#search-top-box-form {
  display: flex;
  font-size: 18px;
}

#search-top-box-form input {
  background-color: white;
  border: 1px solid black;
  margin-right: 10px;
}

#top-bar {
  font-size: 18px;
}

#top-bar .top-bar ul {
  display: flex;
  list-style: none;
}

#top-bar .top-bar ul li {
  padding-right: 5px;
  margin-left: 5px;
  border-right: 1px solid black;
}

#top-bar .top-bar ul li:nth-child(1) {
  margin-left: 0;
}

#top-bar .mobile-top-bar > ul {
  display: none;
}

#login-status {
  display: flex;
}

#account-options {
  display: block !important;
}

#account-topbutton {
  display: none;
}

#account-options ul {
  display: flex;
  flex-wrap: wrap;
}

#account-options ul li {
  padding-right: 5px;
  margin-left: 5px;
  border-right: 1px solid black;
}

#my-account {
  white-space: nowrap;
}

.columns {
  display: flex;
  justify-content: stretch;
}

.columns > div {
  border: 1px solid black;
  padding: 5px;
}

.hovertip {
  width: 20%;
  background-color: white;
}

.gay {
  position: relative;
  z-index: 1;
  animation-name: rainbow;
  animation-duration: 15s;
  animation-iteration-count: infinite;
  transform: rotate(4deg);
}

@keyframes rainbow {
  0% {
    color: red;
  }

  13% {
    color: orange;
  }

  25% {
    color: yellow;
  }

  38% {
    color: lime;
  }

  50% {
    color: cyan;
  }

  63% {
    color: royalblue;
  }

  75% {
    color: darkviolet;
  }

  83% {
    color: magenta;
  }

  100% {
    color: red;
  }
}

#wd-editor-toolbar-panel ul {
  display: flex;
  flex-wrap: wrap;
  list-style: none;
}

#wd-editor-toolbar-panel li {
  margin: 3px 10px;
}

.owindow {
  background-color: white;
}

.yui-nav {
  border-bottom: 1px solid black;
}

:root .yui-nav li {
  background-color: #dddddd;
  padding: 5px;
  border: 1px solid black;
}

.yui-nav li.selected {
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[[/module]]


[[a href="#" class="close-sidebar"]]@@ @@[[/a]]

[!-- Title --]

= [[size 150%]] **Cleanliness Guaranteed* Hub*** [[/size]]

[[>]]
[[module rate]]
[[/>]]


[[div style="font-size: 24px"]]
Got a poltergeist in your house? See a dead body moving? Is your property suffering from an uncontrolled buildup of mysterious feces? Well, dial 555-605-CLEANUP and we’ll be there in a lick of a dime! Once we're done, you can rest easy, because we promise...
[[/div]]

[[div style="font-size: 48px; width: 100%; text-align: center; filter: drop-shadow(3px 3px 0 black);" class="gay"]]
**CLEANLINESS GUARANTEED***
[[/div]]

[[div style="font-size: 10px"]]

*Some exceptions apply. Please see the list of exceptions in the Supplemental Document (147.4 MB) below.

[[/div]]



[!-- Left Side Advertisements --]

[[div class="ad-container left"]]

[[div class="ad" style="background-color: #f9f4ec; border: 3px solid #7a4434;"]]
**FUN FACT!** The Safe Cleanup Professionals were rated by Pierre residents as the third highest-rated janitorial organization in 2007!
[[/div]]


[[div class="ad" style="background-color: #111111; color: white; font-family: Times New Roman; box-shadow: 0 0 5px white;"]]
= [[span style="color: #FF3333; font-size: 125%; font-family: Helvetica;"]] //**SCRANTON REALTY**// [[/span]]

At Scranton Realty, we make sure every property is a profit. We understand the Pierre housing market better than anyone, especially in these trying times. With Scranton Realty, your investment works harder than ever - in ways you didn’t even realize were possible.

//Scranton Realty: Because every property has potential… and every potential has a plan.//
[[/div]]


[[div class="ad" style="background-color: #fff5f9; font-family: Trebuchet MS;"]]
= [[span style="color: #e00661; font-size: 200%; font-family: Brush Script MT, serif; "]] Denise Does Dogs [[/span]]
//"No matter how dirty the dog, she'll do it!"//

* Open Tuesday - Saturday: 4pm to midnight
* Ask about our [[span style="color: #e00661;]]double dog deal[[/span]]!!
* Bring your own leash and muzzle.

//"Denise really knows her way around a dog!"//
[[/div]]

[[div class="ad" style="background: radial-gradient(circle, black, #494949); color: white; font-family: Georgia; border: 1px solid white;"]]
= [[span style="font-size: 125%; font-weight: bold; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"]] Smells and Secrets of Pierre [[/span]]

Ever wanted to wade through a sewer? Step into the bowels of our humble town with //Smells and Secrets of Pierre// -- a guided tour of Pierre's incredible sewage system. See the mile-long pipes, mysterious access tunnels, and long-forgotten pumping stations that run beneath our city. Tours all day on Saturdays and Sundays. Flashlight sold separately.


[[/div]]

[[/div]]

[!-- Right Side Advertisements --]

[[div class="ad-container right"]]

[[div class="ad" style="background-color: #19213d; color: white; font-family: "Jost", sans-serif; border: 1px solid black;"]]
= [[size 120%]] See Something? **Say Something.** [[/size]]

Here at the FBI, we value your safety. If you see suspicious or unnatural activity in Pierre, don't hesitate to report it to your local Unusual Incidents Unit. You can submit an anonymous tip to __@@reports@uiu.fbi.gov@@__.

[[=image https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/unusual-incidents-unit-hub/UIU_Logo-NSM.png width="100px"]]

[[/div]]


[[div class="ad" style="background-color: black; color: limegreen; font-family: Verdana; border: 2px solid white;"]]
= [[span style="color: lime;"]] **MR. ALAN LIEN'S COFFEE SHOP** [[/span]]

Now open on Sioux Ave! Rumor says our barista's not from around here...

Try our famous COSMIC CAPPUCCINO and GALACTIC MOCHA!

Open daily, 6 AM - 8 PM. Cash only... for now.

"Best coffee I've ever had, and I don't even like coffee!" - local customer
[[/div]]


[[div class="ad" style="background-color: #dee0f4;"]]
= [[span style="font-size: 200%; font-family: Impact; color: #1861ba;"]] **WE'RE HIRING!** [[/span]]

Join [[span style="font-weight: bold; color: #2018ba;"]] BAGEL BOB'S [[/span]] for pay up to $5/hour! We hire and train ages 16 and up.

Requirements:
* Must accept employer-negotiated wage
* Know how to tie slipknot
* Comfortable with sanguine elements
* Available on full moons.
* Bring a positive attitude!

= [[span style="font-size: 200%; font-family: Impact; color: #1861ba;"]] **APPLY TODAY!** [[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[/div]]
[[tabview]]
[[tab Home]]

[[image https://scp-sandbox-3.wdfiles.com/local--files/collab%3Acleanliness-guaranteed-hub/janitorialcloset.jpg style="float: right; width: 25%; align: margin-right: 100px; transform: rotate(3deg); box-shadow: 2px 2px 5px black; aspect-ratio: 3 / 2; object-fit: cover; object-position: center;"]]

Welcome to **Cleanliness Guaranteed***, a lighthearted tale series reimagining the SCP Foundation as the //Safe Cleanup Professionals// Foundation, a small, struggling janitorial business that's stumbled into the chaotic trade of "cleaning up" the things that go bump in the night.

@@ @@
@@ @@
@@ @@
@@ @@

[[=]]
[[size 150%]] __Latest Posts__ [[/size]]

[[module ListPages tags="cleanliness-guaranteed -hub -fragment -theme" limit="3" separate="no" order="created_at desc"]]
[[size 125%]]%%title_linked%%[[/size]]

Posted by [[*user %%created_by%%]]
%%created_at%%

@@ @@
[[/module]]

[[/=]]

[[/tab]]
[[tab What We Do]]

[[=]]

= Season 1
[[size 150%]] __Sanitize, Cleanse, Polish__ [[/size]]

The Safe Cleanup Professionals need to figure out how to deal with their piling up debt. Just when the amount of odd jobs increases more and more, Fritz makes himself scarce from his employees.

@@ @@

[[collapsible show="▸ Open Episode List" hide="▾ Episode List" folded="no"]]

[[size 125%]][https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/the-pilot The Pilot – The Original][[/size]]

The Thing was made of concrete, dripping from head to toe with its own blood and shit.

by [[*user Alzin Cdag]]

@@ @@

[[size 125%]][https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/welcome-to-site-19 Welcome to Site 19!][[/size]]

An inspector from the FBI Unusual Incidents Unit pays a visit to the SCP Foundation's "Site 19".

by [[*user DoctorLilithSophia]] and [[*user YardBirdMe]]

@@ @@

[[size 125%]][https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/biweekly Biweekly][[/size]]

The Foundation database is deleted. Chaos ensues.

by [[*user radian628]]

@@ @@

[[size 125%]][https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/the-lake-oahe-monster The Lake Oahe Monster][[/size]]

The Safe Cleanup Professionals are contracted by the city for a cleanup that's truly disgusting.

by [[*user ubergoober]]

@@ @@

[[size 125%]][https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/site-19-dossier UIU Location Dossier: "Site 19"][[/size]]

The UIU's top-secret file on Site 19.

by [[*user ubergoober]]

@@ @@

[[size 125%]] [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/cleanup-on-aisle-five Cleanup on Aisle Five] [[/size]]

Clef and Gears can't find their way out of a seemingly endless IKEA building.

by [[*user radian628]] and [[*user ubergoober]]

@@ @@

[[size 125%]] [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/the-unseen-that-lurks The Unseen That Lurks] [[/size]]

Dr. Dan concocts a brilliant plan to catch the most elusive cryptid in the North American continent.

by [[*user radian628]] and [[*user ubergoober]]

More coming soon!

[[/collapsible]]

-----

[[size 150%]] __Standalone Episodes__ [[/size]]

Scenes from the Cleanliness Guaranteed* universe.

@@ @@

[[collapsible show="▸ Open Episode List" hide="▾ Episode List" folded="no"]]

[[size 125%]] [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/clean-up-for-customer-082 Cleanup for Customer-082] [[/size]]

Mr. Fernand is hosting a dinner party, so it's up to Beau, the newest SCProfessional, to get the house clean in time.

by [[*user Mr Panik]]

@@ @@

[[size 125%]] [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/beau-goes-for-a-run Beau Goes For a Run] [[/size]]

Tired of hanging on by his fingernails, Beau takes to the street to blow off some steam.

by [[*user Mr Panik]]

@@ @@

[[size 125%]] [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/a-wyoming-frog-in-pierre A Wyoming Frog in Pierre] [[/size]]

Beau forms an unlikely bond with a cig-smoking frogman from the Cowboy State.

by [[*user SYTYCFanon]]


[[/collapsible]]
[[/=]]

[[/tab]]

[[tab About Us]]

**Cleanliness Guaranteed*** is a lighthearted, character-driven, and down-to-earth comedy about the day-to-day lives of people in a world where the things that go bump in the night, while extremely rare, are very real. It's a simple, small world with inefficient bureaucracies, where the lines between madness and magic are blurred, and with ordinary people trying to navigate themselves through it.

In Cleanliness Guaranteed*, the universe is ripped out of the ground to its very roots -- the SCP Foundation, a globe-spanning shadow organization, is now a small, quasi-professional janitorial business of a dozen-or-so employees called the "Safe Cleanup Professionals Foundation," headquartered in Pierre, South Dakota. The business is struggling to keep itself afloat as it contends with all sorts of unusual creatures, eldritch horrors, liminal hellscapes, and stacks upon stacks of paperwork.

This series is largely rooted in the original [https://archive.is/QD9UF SCP-173] post, with all of its typos and quasi-professionalism. While these most likely weren't intentional, taking them as such presents us with a different lens into the Foundation. It portrays a small, mundane, somewhat bureaucratic group dedicated to the unexplainable -- though their concern is less with how dangerous it is, and more with how they're going to keep it cleaned up. The headquarters of this group appear to be at a location named “Site 19," which is, in this setting, a medium-size warehouse converted into an office and storage space.

This group, the SCP Foundation, is genuinely afraid of whatever they have in storage, as even they don’t know where it came from. They clearly don't want to deal with these things, but they have no other choice but to do so. Cleanliness Guaranteed* is based all around the absurdism and dark comedy of working for a lousy, floundering organization tasked with containing all these horrors that lurk in the dark. Most importantly, the Safe Cleanup Professionals, while certainly flawed, are ultimately good people, who are just trying to go about their lives and pay the bills. There is no containment, there is no conspiracy, and there is no doctrine of normalcy. The "Veil of Secrecy" in this universe is not maintained by any omnipresent shadow organization or world government; instead, the anomalous world is a self-preserving secret, as paranormal events are rare enough for people to go their whole lives without thinking twice if they really exist.

Anomalies in this setting don't have to be murder statues, but they have to be on the edge of weird enough that the world isn't immediately ending because of them. It's urban intrusion fantasy; more crank calls about UFOs or ghosts haunting someone's house rather than entire magical civilizations and worlds. In the main series, the overarching theme among many of the anomalies is the piling up of filth and trash, ignored by people who are unconcerned.

To sum it all up, the setting is as grounded as it can be in a world with anomalies. Think a mixture between slice-of-life, dark comedy, mild horror, and low urban fantasy.

[[/tab]]
[[tab Our Employees]]

**Safe Cleanup Professionals:**

||= **Name** ||= **Description** ||
|| Fritz Diedrich Williams || Businessman, MBA graduate, and the founder and Administrator of the Safe Cleanup Professionals Foundation. Fritz is simultaneously charismatic and insufferable, with his laziness and apathy towards his company often alienating him from his employees. Despite being a slimy and mostly useless boss, Fritz's leadership skills do come out when they're needed. In addition to the Foundation, Fritz runs a number of other small businesses. ||
|| Francis "Dr. Alto Clef" Wojciechowski || A disgruntled but generally upbeat British East Asian man in his 30s, working as a janitor for the Foundation. Clef usually takes the role of the comedic sillyman, with his antics often ending up causing more of a mess than was there to begin with. However, his abrasiveness can end up making the other employees feel annoyed or uncomfortable by him. Clef's life isn't all laughs -- outside of work, he struggles to pay the bills on janitor wages while taking care of his teenage daughter. ||
|| Charles Ogden Gears || A no-nonsense HMCL supervisor and accountant for the Foundation in his late 40s. He's unemotional, detached, and logical, to the point of being abrasive and unempathetic towards his coworkers. Gears is a stickler for the rules, because when the SCP Foundation gets into hot water, he has to do all the paperwork. But despite being the straight man of the group, Gears can be surprisingly witty and even badass at times, especially when in the field. ||
|| Tilda David Moose || The director of Site 19, and Fritz's second-in-command. Fairly stern, level-headed, and has an obsession with the occult. Moose is sometimes neurotic and insecure on the inside, but being in their position, they often find themselves stepping up to the plate as the de facto leader. Moose is by far the sanest member of the Foundation, and knows how to get things done when it's needed. They're friends with Dee, with both of them bonding over being nonbinary. ||
|| Dee Camille Lass || A long-suffering intern in their early 20s who is made to do the worst jobs. Dee acts as a parody of the standard Foundation's limitless and disposable D-Class, with them often being delegated nasty, unusual, or outright dangerous situations that they nonetheless walk out of alive. Dee is in some ways an everyman character, responding to their circumstances with a shrug and a sigh -- after all, the hazard pay keeps them above the poverty line. Dee has a rival/mentor relationship with Clef, and friendly competition with Beau. ||
|| Maria Wesley Jones || A fresh-out-of-college computer science graduate in her early 20s, who acts as the IT specialist for the Foundation. Maria struggles with workaholism and social anxiety, with her typically dwelling in the small, overcrowded RAISA office. She manages the unstable, rapidly failing database she inherited from her predecessors, motivated by excessive coffee and the prospect of one day detangling the Foundation's software infrastructure. ||
|| Beauregard 'Beau' Bartholomew Larkin || A young new recruit and intern at the Foundation. Beau's gentle nature keeps him popular with the customers, but the chaos of his personal life is always banging at the door of his peace-of-mind. He usually ends up taking similar odd jobs to Dee, often going solo to strange businesses and locations in Pierre. With questionable decisions and a mental break under his belt, Beau is just trying to keep the rent paid while he clings to reality. ||
|| Radcliffe J. I. Gerald || The Foundation's on-and-off getaway driver and heavy transportation guy, Gerald is the kind of asshole who drives at twice the speed limit and passes everyone without any regard for their safety. Results are all that matter. While he's by far the most efficient driver on the team as far as speed goes, he will invariably break something upon reaching his destination, whether that be the vehicle, some cargo, or a pedestrian's femur. ||

@@ @@

**Other Characters:**

|| Jeremiah Cimmerian || The cynical, perpetually disgruntled inspector and contact from the Foundation's employer: the UIU. He had half of his face burned off by a coffee during a Foundation inspection, and still holds a grudge against the Foundation for it. Still, he's one of the few at the UIU that don't want to have the Foundation immediately shut down -- though whether that's from ulterior motive or kindness of heart is unclear. ||
|| Damien O'Connor || Former head of IT and co-founder of the Foundation, who left in 2005 to form rival company C.A.O.S. Inc. Damien is less of an active threat and more of a background villain -- much like Fritz, he's relatively uninvolved with what his subordinates do, besides translating orders from a cryptic natural-language generator known as "The Engine." ||
|| Dr. Daniel "Dan" Daniels || An ex-military cryptozoologist, and the self-proclaimed greatest cryptid hunter in all of South Dakota. Dan has spent the last twenty years searching for the most elusive cryptid in North America, always one step behind being able to capture it. He crosses paths with the Safe Cleanup Professionals when the latter are contracted by the police to catch the cryptid in question -- The Unseen That Lurks. ||
|| Robert Scranton || CEO of Scranton Realty, a real estate company in Pierre that sold Site 19 to Fritz in 2003 for what seemed like a bargain at the time. Scranton and his company represent the largest threat to the Foundation yet -- mortgage payments on the property. Scranton himself acts as a mentor-like figure to Fritz, with Fritz seeing him as the powerful and successful businessman he always dreamed of being. ||

Keep in mind that there are more employees at the Foundation than just the ones listed here. Feel free to add your own -- they're not all just old author avatars. There are also lots of people and places in Pierre and beyond that have yet to be explored!

@@ @@

-----

@@ @@

**Competitors, Benefactors, and Us:**

||= **Name** ||= **Description** ||
|| Safe Cleanup Professionals Foundation (That's us!) || An independent startup cleaning company consisting of about a dozen or so employees. The company was founded by Fritz Williams in 2003, and is headquartered in Pierre, South Dakota. Officially contracted by the Unusual Incidents Unit to clean up their dirty work, both figuratively and literally. Despite primarily doing cleanup and storage, the Foundation is flexible in what they do -- as long as it gets them paid. ||
|| FBI, Unusual Incidents Unit || A large division of the FBI that does the work of the US government beneath the public eye. Has almost no oversight by a government which would rather ignore the existence of the anomalous. The UIU is composed of normal people, for the most part -- with a staff body of agents and pencil-pushers, but with a tinge of malice and power from the bureaucrats on top. ||
|| Cleanup and Optimizing Solutions, Incorporated || A rival cleaning company competing with the Foundation. C.A.O.S. Inc. was founded by Damien O'Connor, one of Fritz's closest colleagues, along with several of his followers after a messy schism in the Foundation years ago. The company tries a much more aggressive approach to getting their revenue, taking orders from a mysterious natural-language computer known as "the Engine." ||

Many Groups of Interest of the mainline Foundation are still around in Cleanliness Guaranteed*, and when including one in a story, make sure to scale it down while preserving the original idea or bringing something new to the table. Remember, in this setting, the Foundation is a small fish in a medium-sized pond -- GoIs can (and probably should) outrank or outpace the Foundation, but there are no national agencies, global religions, or massive corporations dedicated to the anomalous.

[[/tab]]

[[tab Customer Artwork]]
[[div class="fanart-tab"]]
[[image https://scp-sandbox-3.wikidot.com/local--files/collab:cleanliness-guaranteed-hub/20250501_110451.jpg]]
By [[*user CrazyGrayzee]], depicting [[[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/welcome-to-site-19 | Welcome to Site 19!]]].
[[/div]]
[[/tab]]

[[tab Join The Company]]

Cleanliness Guaranteed* is always open to submissions from anyone. However, it's important to familiarize yourself with the fundamentals of the setting before writing. The following entries give a good overview of the setting and its vibes:
* [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/site-19-dossier UIU Location Dossier: Site 19]
* [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/cleanup-for-customer-082 Cleanup for Customer 082]
* [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/biweekly Biweekly]

//Sanitize, Cleanse, Polish// is the main storyline for Cleanliness Guaranteed*, and is currently open to new contributions. If you want to write for it, we'd like you to follow a few guidelines. Ideally, main series tales should focus on the main six characters of the Safe Cleanup Professionals (introduced in Welcome to Site 19). You're still free to feature your own original characters or adaptations of famous existing ones, as long as there's a focus on characters and slice-of-life. Furthermore, anomalies should typically feature cleaning or janitorial work, with elements of the overarching plot -- that being the Foundation's financial problems with the UIU and Scranton Realty, and the slowly increasing number of filth-based anomalies in Pierre. Lastly, we ask that you get feedback from people on our contact list. As soon as the article has been approved, it can be added to the series!

You can also post standalone episodes outside of the main storyline. These can focus on any aspect of Pierre and its weirdness, and you generally have more freedom with what you want to write. You're also free to write about your own characters, groups, and settings -- though we ask you to preserve the vibes by scaling things down. The setting also takes place in 2007, so while small anachronisms are okay, characters shouldn't have Instagram accounts or be investing in crypto. If you have a character you'd like to add to the Site 19 staff (or elsewhere), go ahead, but make sure they fit within the canon (e.g. no wizards). While we still suggest getting feedback from the contact list, approval isn't needed -- you can add anything to the hub if it fits.

Additionally, if you'd like to start writing your own series within the Cleanliness Guaranteed* setting, you are welcome to do so! Just make sure that when writing anything for this series, you preserve the vibes and intent behind the idea of a third-rate cleaning company in a small, weird city.

You can contact any of us in our Canonexus channel, linked at the bottom of this page. Feel free to ask about writing, characters, or lore!
* [[*user YardBirdMe]] (currently inactive)
* [[*user radian628]]
* [[*user ubergoober]]
* [[*user Mr Panik]]
* [[*user Ethagon]]
* [[*user ThisisNalkan]]

-----

These themes are used for Cleanliness Guaranteed* pages, made by [[*user winkwonkboi]].

[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/theme:cleaning-services Cleaning Services Theme] -- built on Black Highlighter
[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/theme:janitor-closet Janitor's Closet Theme] -- built on Sigma-9

Additionally, if it's part of a series (i.e. //Sanitize, Cleanse, Polish//) then include this Earthworm component at the top of the page.

[[div style="border: 1px solid black; font-family: monospace;"]]
@@[[include :scp-wiki:component:earthworm@@
| previous-url= url-goes-here
| previous-title= previous-page-name
| next-url= url-goes-here
| next-title= next-page-name
| hub-url=/
| hub-title= page-name
@@]]@@
[[/div]]

Make sure to set this hub as the parent page!

[[/tab]]
[[/tabview]]

@@ @@


[[div style="margin: auto; text-align: center;"]]

[[image https://scp-sandbox-3.wikidot.com/local--files/collab:cleanliness-guaranteed-hub/logo.png width="100px"]]

[[span style="font-size: 150%; font-weight: bold;"]]
[https://discord.gg/34hnt4jeMT Join the Safe Cleanup Professionals today!]
[[/span]]
#cleanliness-guaranteed in Canonexus

[[/div]]

@@ @@

@@ @@

[[include :scp-wiki:component:license-box
|author=ubergoober, radian628, Mr Panik, Alzin Cdag, Ethagon, YardBirdMe, DoctorLilithSophia]]
> **Filename:** janitorialcloset.jpg
> **Name:** 2015-04-28 19 11 29 Janitorial closet at the National Weather Service Weather Forecast Office in Elko, Nevada (NWS WFO LKN).jpg
> **Author:** Famartin
> **License:** Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 4.0 International
> **Source Link:** https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:2015-04-28_19_11_29_Janitorial_closet_at_the_National_Weather_Service_Weather_Forecast_Office_in_Elko,_Nevada_(NWS_WFO_LKN).jpg

> **Filename:** 20250501_110451.jpg
> **Author:** CrazyGrayzee
> **License:** CC BY-SA 3.0
> **Source Link:** [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/cleanliness-guaranteed-hub SCP Wiki]

> **Filename:** logo.png
> **Author:** adasba
> **License:** CC BY-SA 3.0
> **Source Link:** [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/cleanliness-guaranteed-hub SCP Wiki]

> **Filename:** UIU_Logo-NSM.png
> **Author:** JackalRelated
> **License:** CC BY-SA 3.0
> **Source Link:** [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/unusual-incidents-unit-hub SCP Wiki]
[[include :scp-wiki:component:license-box-end]]

Cleanliness Guaranteed*

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