Coda's Cupboard

Link to article: Coda's Cupboard.

@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Spectral');
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Metal+Mania&family=Nanum+Pen+Script&family=Roboto:ital,wght@0,100;0,300;0,400;0,500;0,700;0,900;1,100;1,300;1,400;1,500;1,700;1,900&family=Spectral:ital,wght@0,200;0,300;0,400;0,500;0,600;0,700;0,800;1,200;1,300;1,400;1,500;1,600;1,700;1,800&display=swap');
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Merienda:wght@300..900&display=swap');

@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Tapestry&display=swap" rel="stylesheet');
:root {
  --header-title: "SCP WIKI";
  --header-subtitle: "Scary Creepy Pasta!!!";
  --body-font: 'Spectral', Inter, BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Oxygen,Ubuntu,Cantarell,'Fira Sans','Droid Sans','Helvetica Neue',sans-serif;
  --mono-font: 'Spectral', 'Andale Mono', 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;
  --accentColor: #2E47AA;
  --lightColor: #0c0f3bff;
  --darkerColor: #e5d1f0;
  --darkColor: #f9f9fbff

}

```
#page-title {
display: none;
```

(none)

(none)

[[include :scp-wiki:theme:penumbra]]
[[module CSS]]
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Spectral');
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Metal+Mania&family=Nanum+Pen+Script&family=Roboto:ital,wght@0,100;0,300;0,400;0,500;0,700;0,900;1,100;1,300;1,400;1,500;1,700;1,900&family=Spectral:ital,wght@0,200;0,300;0,400;0,500;0,600;0,700;0,800;1,200;1,300;1,400;1,500;1,600;1,700;1,800&display=swap');
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Merienda:wght@300..900&display=swap');
[[/module]]

[[module CSS]]
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Tapestry&display=swap" rel="stylesheet');
:root {
  --header-title: "SCP WIKI";
  --header-subtitle: "Scary Creepy Pasta!!!";
  --body-font: 'Spectral', Inter, BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Oxygen,Ubuntu,Cantarell,'Fira Sans','Droid Sans','Helvetica Neue',sans-serif;
  --mono-font: 'Spectral', 'Andale Mono', 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;
  --accentColor: #2E47AA;
  --lightColor: #0c0f3bff;
  --darkerColor: #e5d1f0;
  --darkColor: #f9f9fbff

}
[[/module]]


[[module css]]
#page-title {
display: none;
[[/module]]

-----

[[=]]
+ CODA'S CUPBOARD
[[module Rate]]
[[/=]]

Oh, hey! How long have //you// been here?

Just loaded the page? Okay, good, good, I didn't keep you waiting. Welcome to my place! Make yourself at home - kick back, relax, kick forward, un-lax, get mud in the carpet, crawl on the ceiling... mi casa su casa! That's Spanish for "ma maison est ta maison," you know!

If you're hungry, go ahead and take anything you want from the cupboard. I like to keep it stocked with strange stories, corny jokes, silly characters, and fresh vegetables - take a look, try whatever catches your interest!

I'll be in the living room, watching pirated episodes of Invader Zim on my phone even though the TV's right there. Let me know if you need anything!

-----

[[collapsible show="Try the... Popcorn and Ugali Fries? 
(SCP-8036:  I Love the Theater)" hide="- Close"]]

__**[[[http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-8036 |Object Class: Exempt...]]]**__

Ah, 8036, my first (good) SCP. I had the idea for a movie theater SCP all the way back when I was in high school, but then Deltarune came out or something and I forgot about this entire website for like six years.

I'm glad I wrote it when I did, instead of all the way back then. Liv and Marcie's relationship (and a lot of their dialogue verbatim) is pulled from my relationship with my now-fiancé, and I think having that element of actual lived experience makes the story feel so much more alive than if I had tried writing it as a teenager. It's not perfect - it's //way// too long and that Third Act Misunderstanding is //extremely// rushed - but I'm still happy with it. It's my highest-rated article, and, weirdly, my only article to see representation on TVTropes, so that's gotta count for something!

= [[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Q0UT1ipukCU&pp=ygUQaW1wZXJpYWwgdGVlbiBoYQ%3D%3D |Bonus Track!]]]

[[/collapsible]]

[[collapsible show="Try the... Old Soda? 
(SCP-7523:  The King of Beverages)" hide="- Close"]]

__**[[[http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-7523 |It's the sweet one!]]]**__

The idea behind this SCP started as "what if amnestics were actually an extremely common store-bought soft drink, but the Foundation didn't know that, because said soft drink was amnestics and they kept forgetting." I struggled a lot with what to actually //call// the soda - coming up with plausible-sounding fake brand names is //hard// - before I eventually realized that it would be way funnier if the soda was actually just straight-up Dr Pepper. From there, the character of Charles Alderton, devious alchemist and soda peddler, developed naturally.

Unfortunately, I think this one was //really// held back by the format. It's hard to tell a conman story exclusively from the perspective of the people who got conned, //especially// where magic memory-erasing drugs are involved. I didn't really convey what was going on well at all.

Maybe someday, the story of Dr. Alderton and his schemes will be told in full... not counting on it, though. For some reason, I keep forgetting to write a follow-up...

= [[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HXk-0_rETJ8&pp=ygUScmVkZXNpZ24geW91ciBsb2dv |Bonus Track!]]]

[[/collapsible]]

[[collapsible show="Try the... Turkey Sandwich? (SCP-8092:
The Disposable Mind of Foxlot Greaze)" hide="- Close"]]

__**[[[http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-8092 |Where yesterday's flesh is suddenly fresh...]]]**__

I knew I wanted to write an SCP universe adaptation of Pinocchio at some point, and I would've wanted to cast different SCP characters as Pinoccho's rotating list of terrible terrible father figures. Herman Fuller was the exact archetype needed for the circus role, and Dr. Wondertainment would make a fantastic Pleasure Island... but I needed a Fox. Someone sleazy, untrustworthy, but ultimately incompetent and kind of trivial to deal with.

I discovered Greazeburger, Incorporated specifically while looking for GOIs that would fit the Fox role. They were //perfect.// I initially started writing Foxlot Greaze's story as a sort of stealth-prequel to set up my Pinocchio adaptation... but, as it turns out, Foxlot had a story to tell all his own.

I'm still really, //really// proud of this one. It kind of flew under the radar, but it's maybe my second-favorite thing I've written for the site, and Foxlot is one of my favorite characters I've ever made. Honestly, you're all lucky I had to kill him off, or else I would be spamming dozens of Foxlot-centric tales by the month!

= [[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=S-H18J2Ujjs&pp=ygUdcHJldHR5IGJhbGFuY2VkIGZlYXIgb2YgZHlpbmc%3D |Bonus Track!]]]

[[/collapsible]]

[[collapsible show="Try the... School Cafeteria Rolls?
(Ridgewell Edutainment Center Newsletter)" hide="- Close"]]

__**[[[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/ridgewell-monthly-newsletter |Happy how-de-do, moms and dads!]]]**__

I wrote this one mostly in one sitting as a one-off joke article that didn't mean much. The general reception I seemed to get from people was that the article itself didn't really land, but Ridgewell Edutainment Center showed promise as a setting - which came as a surprise to me! If I had known I would want to expand on the world of Ridgewell, I would've put a lot more thought into the name... ah well, no going back now!

I don't have much to say about this one, because it's really just jokes. Welcome to Night Vale and Wayside School were key inspirations, inspirations which I would take a lot more seriously when writing my next piece...

= [[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CLV3eMvW73g&pp=ygUac2Nob29saG91c2Ugcm9jayBtciBtb3J0b24%3D |Bonus Track!]]]

[[/collapsible]]

[[collapsible show="Try the... Candy Circus Peanuts?
(The Puppet)" hide="- Close"]]

__**[[[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/the-puppet |Of course, of course!]]]**__

Like I mentioned, I had wanted to write a Pinocchio SCP adaptation for a while, but hadn't quite cracked what it should actually //be//. The announcement of Public Domain Con was the kick I needed to actually figure this story out, and my teammates built the perfect foundation for me to write off of.

I remember before the contest, I wanted to write my adaptation in purely traditional prose, with Pinocchio being this absentminded goofball character that everyone else would play the straight man to. That didn't work for so, //so// many reasons, and I'm so glad the chips actually fell where they did.

= [[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=jKt0l6x399E&pp=ygUPZGV2byBwdXBwZXQgYm95 |Bonus Track!]]]

[[/collapsible]]

[[collapsible show="Try the... Whale... Food? I guess?
(The Real Boy)" hide="- Close"]]

__**[[[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/the-real-boy |Together we are a forest.]]]**__

As I was writing my Pinocchio article, it became extremely clear it wasn't going to resolve itself. We hadn't even //met// Pinocchio yet, we had just followed close behind him the entire article, and there was no way we were going to get to a satisfying resolution chasing up that trail alone.

So, I wrote an ending in traditional prose, and it was pretty bad, but Public Domain Con was coming to a close and there wasn't much I could've done. I'll be honest, I'm not super happy with this one - I like the chapter that came before, but this ending was just clearly rushed and stilted in a way that makes it sort of embarassing to read back through.

I'm glad that Cthulhu (one of my teammates) wrote a //much// better ending for our little Pinocchio arc, and was able to get it out before the contest closed! I wasn't able to wrap up this story super well, but I didn't have to do it alone, y'know?

= [[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eFyes-CT0zY&pp=ygUZaW4gdGhlIGJlbGx5IG9mIHRoZSB3aGFsZdIHCQnNCQGHKiGM7w%3D%3D |Bonus Track!]]]

[[/collapsible]]

[[collapsible show="Try the... Leftover Popeye's?
(SCP-8608: Nothing is Ever Nothing)" hide="- Close"]]

__**[[[http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-8608 |I OBSERVE MY SPEED TO BE 37,200 KMph AND RISING.]]]**__

This one speaks for itself.

= [[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fqGKZ3fzN1M&pp=ygUabW91bnRhaW4gZ29hdHMgbm8gY2hpbGRyZW4%3D |Bonus Track!]]]

[[/collapsible]]

[[collapsible show="Try the... Wild Venison?
(SCP-8313: The Christian Jubilee)" hide="- Close"]]

__**[[[http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-8313 |Don't you wanna go to that land, don't you wanna go to that land...]]]**__

The phrase "Good Brook Bible Camp" had been floating around in my head for a few years, but I had never quite been able to crack it. I remember trying to write one story where the camp was overrun by some kind of alien that had crash-landed there and convinced all the campers it was God, sort of trial-and-erroring its way into learning how to feign being the Christian God. In another iteration, a young trans woman returned to an abandoned campground where some real Adventures in Odyssey-type antics had happened in her childhood. I still like both of those ideas and might come back to them, if I'm ever a strong enough writer to sell the religious commentary.

In the end, making everything grounded in the horror genre, and confining myself to the format of a "classic" SCP, //really// helped this story develop. I'm happy with this one, and I'm proud of myself for writing a true-blue creepypasta that might actually even be a little unsettling!

= [[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=rw7UoZ4ISZ4&pp=ygUUc29uZyB3aXRoIGZpdmUgbmFtZXM%3D |Bonus Track!]]]

[[/collapsible]]

[[collapsible show="Try the... Smoked Sardines?
(SCP-8936: The Candlefish)" hide="- Close"]]

__**[[[http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-8936 |A small god, for lonely things.]]]**__

Writing this article was //really// driven by me wanting a fifth Series 9 article to my name before Series 10 opened up. I asked my friends Ooga and Cthulhu for one-word prompts, I got "lantern" and "river," and the article kind of spun off from there. The theme moreso became "candle" and "ocean," but hey, I couldn't call it the lanternfish. That's a type of fish already.

It was really fun researching extinct species for this one, and I did some actual image manipulation for once! Very very simple, but still!

The last bit was definitely the hardest to work out how to write, and I spent a few days mulling over how exactly it should all play out. Obviously this whole article had to build up to //something// about nuclear weapons - hard to write about an extinction god from the perspective of a paramilitary organization without nukes coming up - but I didn't know if I had anything to //say// about that topic that hasn't been said a million times. Nuclear weapons are bad. No kidding. In the end I kept things broad and simple, and let the Candlefish live out a sort of wish fufillment of what I would //want// to say to anyone with a finger on the big red button. I think it worked out for the best.

Originally Laurel Carver was going to have a seat at that meeting, as well as two other characters named Junior Officer Micheal Flynn, Senior and Senior Officer Flynn Micheal, Junior. While I still think those names are pretty funny in a very period-accurate "Catch-22" kind of way, ultimately it all just felt too bloated.

= [[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=d_wG_ViHLjs&pp=ygUNeWF6b28gbXIgYmx1ZQ%3D%3D |Bonus Track!]]]

[[/collapsible]]

[[collapsible show="Try the... Baker's Dozen Donuts?
(There's No Such Thing as Twelve)" hide="- Close"]]

__**[[[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/nosuchthingastwelve |Problems we're not supposed to have.]]]**__

I'd wanted to do more with Ridgewell for a while, and this story in particular sat as an unfinished draft in my draft pile for //months//. I tried writing it in the lesson plan format, then again as an SCP, then as an original tale, and finally in the lesson plan format again. I still don't think it's perfect, but I think it's funny and it helps establish Ridgewell as an actual GOI as opposed to a one-off joke.

The previous Ridgewell article was, in some ways, making things easy for myself - a history lesson is an easy framing device for a short story, since history is a narrative already. I wanted to challenge myself to see how the format would hold up in a different subject, and picked math because it seemed at face value to be the most challenging one to write for. The concept of there inexplicably not being such thing as 'twelve' was just the first place my brain went from there!

= [[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=gWGySKoFZPY&pp=ygUNdGFsbHkgaGFsbCAxM9IHCQmHCgGHKiGM7w%3D%3D |Bonus Track!]]]

[[/collapsible]]

-----

= [[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NCHB0M-DFEM&list=OLAK5uy_nQhFAeqkOfXuzHTEJ5K0CfMFpOgRTJD_s&index=17&pp=8AUB |Bonus Track?]]]


[[include :scp-wiki:component:license-box]]
[[include :scp-wiki:component:license-box-end]]

Coda's Cupboard

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