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[[div class="parapost"]] ##green|**Anonymous**## 06/20/2022 (Mon) 16:40:02 #05286786 ++++++ ##red|This is terrible anons please help me out here## ------ [[include component:image-block | align=left | name=parawatch_greentext.png | caption=16 KB JPG | width=133px]] ##789922|>be me## ##789922|>be 17## ##789922|>3/10 basement dwelling failure## ##789922|>have smokin hot 9/10 goth gf totally out of my league## ##789922|>its going well, been on like three dates## ##789922|>my dumb-fuck brain comes up with a "unique" plan for a date## ##789922|>goths usually like ghost shit## ##789922|>go on parawatch## ##789922|>lot of crackheads here performing satanic rituals or summoning ghosts## ##789922|>probs all bullshit## ##789922|>find a post that sounds simple## [[div class="parapost"]] ##Orange|**aliteralpoopdemon**## 06/16/2022 (Thurs) 24:01:46 #04410382 ------ ++++ ##red|Want to summon a demon for shits 'n giggles?## [[include component:image-block | align=left | name=summon_circle.jpg.jpg | caption=The Correct Design | width=102px]] 1. Get some salt. The higher the quality the better the demon. 2. Get candles, any will do. 3. Draw a pentagram with the salt. 4. Light candles at each of the 5 points of the star. 5. Sit at the center of your pentagram. 6. Chant Tawagoto Akuma three times in a row. It may take a while for the demon to be summoned so dont get your balls in a twist lol [[/div]] ##789922|>parents out of town for the weekend## ##789922|>invite gf to mi casa later that night and I go to walmart and buy shit## ##789922|>we're sitting in my room on the floor across from each other## ##789922|>i draw a pentagram on the floor in salt (got that kosher shit, its not cheap)## ##789922|>im nervous as fuck so im holding my breath## ##789922|>i light some cheap ass half used candles from bed bath and beyond we have below the sink## ##789922|>its like 3 am by that point (witching hour aaaa so spooky)## ##789922|>perform the ritual## ##789922|>she refuses to chant with me## ##789922|>...## ##789922|>find out its cause she finds it legit scary## ##789922|>megawin.png## ##789922|>later in the night## ##789922|>watching netflix## ##789922|>full on creep out show## ##789922|>she huddles in my arms## ##789922|>"Don't worry baby. I'll protect you..." (¬‿¬)## ##789922|>start to make my move## ##789922|>i notice im about to blast ass## ##789922|>uhoh.jpeg## ##789922|>stand my ground## ##789922|>the blast doors have given in and the stormtroopers have gone through## ##789922|>much more than that## ##789922|>mfw i shit myself## ##789922|>she notices## ##789922|>fuckingchristthepain.jpeg## ##789922|>"Uh... sorry anon, it's getting a bit late. See you Monday at school!"## ##789922|>sprints out past me## ##789922|>fast forward to this morning## ##789922|>dont see her anywhere in the school## ##789922|>fuck i might have scared her off## ##789922|>come back home, mom confronts me## ##789922|>"Anon what the fuck did you do to your carpet?"## ##789922|>ohshit.jpeg## ##789922|>realize i let the fucking salt sit the entire weekend## ##789922|>now there is a big stain on my carpet i cant explain to my family## ##789922|>mfw gf left the school just because i made an ass of myself## ##789922|>mfw i realize im a gullible shitbag who trusts people on the internet## ##red| what the fuck do i do now## [[/div]] [[div class="parapost reply1"]] ##Orange|**aliteralpoopdemon**## 06/20/2022 16:55:12 #8711234 ------ get fucked lmao... ---- Underworld IP address recognized. [[[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/mfw/offset/1|See linked Underwatch post?]]] [[/div]]