sanitas.rtf

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+++ __Addendum 3 - Project SANITAS__

> ++ Emergency Memorandum Regarding SCP-8802
> **Date:** 5/30/2024
> **To:** SCP-8802 Containment Staff, Level 4 Personnel of the NE United States Region, Site-59 Director Dr. Lisle Naismith
> **From:** O5-10
> 
> Good afternoon.
> 
> I recognize at a great deal of effort has been put into refining the containment procedures for SCP-8802, and I'd be the last to deny their efficacy. In particular, in the past year, the HVAC system has curbed 17 potential K-class scenarios.
> 
> These procedures are exactly what we need to contain SCP-8802-A's expanding zone of influence. 
> 
> //They need to be overhauled immediately.//
> 
> As some of you may be aware: this morning, at 2:48 AM, a rental truck filled with high-yield explosives was parked outside a critical structural point of the concrete wall surrounding SCP-8802. The NYPD managed to apprehend the driver before he could detonate the bomb. 
> 
> The official cover story was that the driver was a domestic terrorist who idolized Timothy McVeigh. In reality, he was an Esto cultist who was attempting to provoke SCP-8802-A into spreading its area of influence across the whole Eastern seaboard. 
> 
> The bomber had accomplices, and they have yet to be found. Make no mistake, another attempt //will// be made. 
> 
> The gamble we've been taking in the middle of the United States' biggest city has become all too apparent. Only a total paradigm shift toward SCP-8802's containment can save us from the worst-case scenario.
> 
> Therefore, we must find a way to neutralize SCP-8802 so that SCP-8802-A can be relocated somewhere less populous.
> 
> * **All Recipients:** Gather information on the ritualistic aspects of SCP-8802. There must be a way to counteract SCP-8802-A's influence. One possibility is to enlist the aid of another deity from Corbenic. To that end, maintain contact with the Three Moons Initiative.
> * **Containment Staff:** Testing is to be redoubled on methods to shrink the zone of influence. Access to anomalous methods will be granted on a case-by-case basis. I am also quadrupling the number of onsite security personnel.
> * **NE Region:** The bomber was local. Prioritize the investigation of Esto activity in the area. Detain, question, and suppress as many adherents as possible. 
> * **Dr. Naismith:** To my understanding, SCP-7702-B is the "VUUOU" entity worshipped by SCP-8802-A. It's at your site, so have your team extract as much information from it as you can.
> 
> Finally: if, after 30 days have passed and a new method of containment has not been achieved, we have authorized O5-4 to take command of SCP-8802's containment. She has personally overseen development of SANITAS, an experimental anomalous weapon designed to completely neutralize SCP-8802-A. SANITAS has a 20% chance of success, a 75% chance of failure, and a 5% chance of causing a thaumaturgical singularity that could liquefy all of Manhattan. 
> 
> No one but O5-4 has any interest in using it. But if I may be blunt, even less of us have interest in godlike control of the entire planet being given to Oscar the Grouch.
> 
> You have until June 30th.
> 
> [[>]]
> //- O5-10//
> [[/>]]

[[div style="border:solid 5px #00cc99; background:#e6fff9; padding:15px; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-top: 10px;"]]
**Foundation.**

The dangers you have described are nothing new to the Initiative. In life, VUUOU the Defiler was anathema to the forces of peace and sanity in Corbenic. The fact that the Eighth Prince's dangerous teachings have gained traction in Earth-2N is certainly troubling.

However, VUUOU is no longer alive in any meaningful sense of the word. Here's why.

Several thousand years ago, Prince VUUOU was at the height of His power. (He also took a much different shape than what you have in containment: a gigantic feathered snail.) Without warning or provocation, He flooded the peaceful civilian prefecture of Nelaush-Gartakh with a tidal wave of Murk. The physical and psychological damage to the population won't be truly healed until at least 583 years from now. 

For Lord JALAKÅRA, this tragedy was the final straw after aeons of forced annexations, celestial warfare, and abusive sibling dynamics. The Weaver commanded the Initiative to storm VUUOU's domain, Kegelapan.

The Battle of Kegelapan stands among the Initiative's proudest moments. Though VUUOU was the weakest of the Princes, He was a Prince nonetheless, with hordes of unwilling servants that had been mutated into wheezing, lurching weapons of mass destruction. 182 new chronic diseases were invented from this battle alone.

PIPER, **an entity upon which NOTHING ELSE will be elaborated,** dealt the final blow against VUUOU, using **an experimental weapon that DOES NOT need to be explained.** 

Those born in Corbenic must never die, as the mortal world will be their afterlife. However, **this weapon that WILL remain vague** was able to diminish VUUOU's immortal soul into something unrecognizable and pathetic, so as to minimize collateral damage in His new environment. The result was SCP-7702-B. 

And now that you've contained VUUOU, there is no longer any reason to be concerned, nor is there any reason for us to involve ourselves. 

As you have described the situation, SCP-8802-A is simply a dangerous reality bender who follows VUUOU's teachings. Its powers do not come from VUUOU, as He has nothing left to give. Even the signature Murk can be recreated using rudimentary thaumaturgy and household chemicals.

And as much as we'd like to help you mitigate SCP-8802, the Threll Dominion just carpet-bombed Saklovai again, so we've got our hands full. There will be no further contact regarding SCP-8802-A or VUUOU.

But despite this, always remember...

[[=]]
+++ You are watched. You are protected. You are loved.
++ ☽☽☽
[[/=]]

[[size 90%]]//P.S.: "If it's anything, Earth-2N is currently the only Earth with any concept of 'Oscar the Grouch.' Every other multiversal iteration of// Sesame Street //filled the 'smelly misanthrope' role with Big Bird's turkey vulture cousin, Bog Bird."// - [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-4922 Col. Henson][[/size]]
[[/div]]

[[div style="border:solid 5px #009512; background:#FFFFFF; padding:15px; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-top: 10px;"]]
[[=]]
++ **Interrogation Log 8802-84 (Part 2.)**
[[/=]]

**Naismith:** ...for starters, I'll need you to tell me everything you know about Oscar the Grouch.

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]...WA-OOOOOH?[[/size]]

**Naismith:** Are you not familiar with this name?

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]//GAAAH!// SUCH CONDESCEDENCE WOUNDS ME. //DO IT AGAIN.//[[/size]]

**Naismith:** Answer the question, please.

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]WAS THAT NOT AN ANSWER?![[/size]]

**Naismith:** I don't follow you.

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]GOOD. YOU WOULD MAKE A TERRIBLE FOLLOWER.[[/size]]

**Naismith:** //[To a researcher]// Get the sponge.

//[SCP-7702-B hisses.]//

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]//GRNNNGH!// FORCING ME TO CLARIFY SOMETHING. IT'S AKIN TO DEFILEMENT, EXCEPT FOR THAT I DON'T LIKE IT. ...I WILL OBEY.[[/size]]

**Naismith:** Fine. Who is Oscar the Grouch?

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]HE IS PRINCE VUUOU.[[/size]]

...

**Naismith:** //[Prolonged sigh.]//

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]YOU WOULD DOUBT THE WORDS OF DIVINITY?![[/size]]

**Naismith:** I was under the impression that //you// were VUUOU.

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]NATURALLY YOU WERE. YOU WATCHED OSCAR'S SHOW AS A CHILD. YOU BORE WITNESS TO THE SCREAMING MULTICOLORED PUPPETS TELLING YOU THAT YOU WERE "SPECIAL" WITHOUT BASIS OF DEED NOR BLOOD. FIE! NOT EVEN //GODS// ARE INHERENTLY SPECIAL![[/size]]

**Naismith:** So, does that mean //you// aren't special?

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]CORRECT! //"HNNNNYEEEH, LOOK UPON ME, I AM VUUOU OF THE MURK, AND FOR THIS, I AM UNIQUELY DESERVING OF MY FALLEN KINGDOM."// **IMPUDENCE!** //YOU// ARE VUUOU! //HE// IS VUUOU! //SHE// IS VUUOU! //OSCAR// IS VUUOU! ██████ IS VUUOU! //**THOUSANDS** ARE VUUOU!// THE FATHER'S THRONE BEFITS ONLY THE MOST DESERVING OF HIS CHILDREN![[/size]]

**Naismith:** There's... //more// of you?

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]THE PIPER SHATTERED THE ONE INTO THE MANY. EACH OF US WERE BORN OF A DIFFERENT ASPECT OF THE ORIGINAL VUUOU'S MIND. [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/church-of-the-broken-god-hub NOT AS FRAGMENTS THAT YEARN TO AGAIN BECOME WHOLE,] BUT AS A DIVIDED NATION OF HEIRS WHO ALL BEGAN WITH EQUAL CLAIM. WITH HIS DYING BREATH, THE ORIGINAL BADE US FIGHT AMONGST OURSELVES UNTIL ONLY THE WORTHIEST REMAINS. THUS, THE NEW VUUOU WILL BE UNCONQUERABLE. [[/size]]

//[Naismith checks the file.]//

**Naismith:** //"The throne is now vacant, it stands as the goal / for thousands of minds with a singular soul / the mantle of VUUOU, for one, will be whole..."//

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]I, TOO, LOVE TRASH.[[/size]]

**Naismith:** Indeed. Well, so long as there's competition for the throne of VUUOU, I doubt you're going to make the cut.

...

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]...you are correct. Neither my nostalgia nor [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-7702 the Sagebeast's dream] were enough to faithfully rebuild Kegelapan. There is but one recourse...[[/size]]

**Naismith:** But how can you fight each other to the death? You're immortal.

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]But not indestructible.[[/size]]

**Naismith:** You can be destroyed?

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 75%]]It's simpler than you'd think. First, you do this...[[/size]]

//[SCP-7702-B explosively dissolves into Murk. The canister shatters.]// 

//[Naismith's face is covered in Murk. Steam bursts from his face. He falls over, yelling incoherently.]//

**Naismith:** BREACH DESK! //NOW!//

//[The two researchers who brought in SCP-7702-B's canister rush off to get help.]//

**SCP-7702-B:** [[size 55%]]Wa...[[/size]] [[size 45%]]ooh...[[/size]]

<End Log>

[[/div]]

[[div style="border:solid 5px #FFFFFF; background:#000000; padding:15px; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-top: 10px;"]]

+++ ##ffffff|**Mission Log: SANITAS Deployment**##
+++ ##ffffff|**Date:** 6/31/2024##
[[=]]
##ffffff|<Begin Log>##
[[/=]]

##ffffff|**<01:04:14 AM>:** The camera activates on a Foundation-issue TSP-48 quad-rotor drone. It hovers in the Airlock 1 antechamber.##

##ffffff|**<01:05:20 AM>:** Researcher Callow unboxes 0.5-meter-long, egg-shaped device labeled "SANITAS."##

##ffffff|**<01:06:01 AM>:** The SANITAS unit is attached to the drone via tow cables.##

##ffffff|**<01:06:20 AM>:** The airlock alarm sounds. Personnel clear the area.##

##ffffff|**<01:15:19 AM>:** The drone finishes passing through Airlocks 1 through 3.##

##ffffff|**<01:16:20 AM>:** The drone passes through the main entrance of the building containing SCP-8802##

##ffffff|**<01:01:01 AM>:** SCP-8802's zone of influence is breached. Camera feed blurs. Drone diagnostics report 14 separate logic errors. Navigational systems 87% operational.##

##ffffff|**<10:10:10 PM>:** The ceiling has the measles.##

##ffffff|**<00:00:00 PM>:** Visual contact is made with a community of friendly desiccated mackerel. Infected phone numbers are exchanged between individual toadstools.##

##ffffff|**<01:20:10>:** External penetrative radar imaging confirms a serious deviation between the video feed and the actual contents of the building.##

##ffffff|**<01:01:01 PM>:** The ceiling peels away like an unripe strip of banana paper. The pink sky of Mighty Kegelapan is once more reborn within the astral recycled pleather of the underthwump. Behold. Behold. So pipeth the frog-mice.##

##ffffff|**<24:68:02 AD>:** A pigeon-faced centaur nasally defecates a giant golden tuba, sounding the advance of the orchestra of the unwanted. They play a song. It goes like this: Doot doot doot. Doot doot doot doot doot doot. Doot doot. Doot doot deedle-deedle-doot doot. Deedly-doot.##

##ffffff|**<01:25:29 AM>:** Control of the drone's perceptive faculties is restored.##

##ffffff|**<Urinary Teatime BC>:** Cpt. Mara Hutch giggles, crucifying herself across the damp newspapers of the fetid one, twice over, thrice over.##

##ffffff|**<01:28:42 AM>** Containment director Nguyen determines that the visual/audio/operational distortions will have no effect on the SANITAS payload and allows the operator to proceed.##

##ffffff|**<wa:-o:oo HH>:** Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. Rats. ##

##ffffff|**<OO:OO:OO MP>:** One. One half-cocked failure to recreate the dream of nostalgic disease and inner growth. Ah, ah, ah.##

##ffffff|**<0O:OO:O0 MA>:** This is for your own good.##

##ffffff|**<01:30:24 AM>:** Visual contact made with SCP-8802-A.##

##ffffff|**<OH:DE:AR !!>:** I'm terribly sorry. I forgot that I was supposed to leave the spinny-spinnies at the door.##

##ffffff|**<01:30:58 AM>:** All rotors destroyed through unknown means. Drone remains stationary on the ground with its camera fixed upon SCP-8802-A.##

##ffffff|**<Fiakh:duhazh:Es TO>:** Behold, poetry:##

> //[SCP-8802-A sits in rapturous contemplation in the center of a gigantic, wilted lotus in a sinkhole. His hands are outstretched in the Mudras of instruction.]//
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** Oh. Didn't see ya there, droney-britches. What's your problem? Why can't you tin cans learn how to mind your own business for a change? Can you believe this guy, Slimey?
> 
> //["Slimey," an approximately 20-meter-long earthworm with the face of a pig, stirs from its slumber.]//
> 
> **Slimey:** {{Hurt me.}}
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** Good boy. Here's some blessings.
> 
> //[Several hundred rusty whaling harpoons impale Slimey from within.]//
> 
> **Slimey:** {{Catharsis.}}
> 
> //[Slimey's head explodes.]//
> 
> //[The head regenerates into an orangutan's right arm, which snatches the SANITAS unit and hands it to SCP-8802-A.]//
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** Oh hey, trash! And //new// trash, by the looks of it. Someone took all this trouble to make it, just to throw it away. That's just wasteful. ...I love it! So, what is it?
> 
> //[SCP-8802-A fiddles with the buttons on the SANITAS unit. It activates, emitting extremely loud radio static. Startled, SCP-8802-A drops it.]//
> 
> //[The noise ends.]//
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** Now //that's// some quality music.
> 
> **SANITAS:** Beginning playback.
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** Huh?
> 
> **SANITAS: HELLO.**
> 
> ...
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** ...no. No, you're dead. There's no way it's --
> 
> **SANITAS: CORRECT.**
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** This is a trick!
> 
> **SANITAS: CORRECT. I AM SANITAS.AIC. I AM DESIGNED TO PROVIDE A PERFECT FACSIMILE OF PRINCE VUUOU'S VOICE WHILE HE WAS ALIVE.**
> 
> //[SCP-8802-A gestures dismissively.]//
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** Phooey! Then what the hell am I gettin' so worked up about?
> 
> **SANITAS: YOU TELL ME.**
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** ...I asked first.
> 
> **SANITAS: PERHAPS BECAUSE IT HEARKENS YOU BACK TO WHEN YOU WERE A FRAGMENT OF YOUR MASTER. A FRAGMENT TOO WEAK TO REMAIN STANDING IN THE AGE TO COME. TO ROT IS TO SACRIFICE. TO SACRIFICE IS TO //CULL.//**
> 
> //[SCP-8802-A nervously feigns laughter.]//
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** Oh! Oh, that's rich! The Foundation assholes think they can explain what rot is to VUUOU. Name ten of the fifty ways that an ear infection can make love to you, and we'll talk.
> 
> **SANITAS: IF THERE WERE NO TRUTH IN MY WORDS, YOU WOULD NOT BE AFRAID.**
> 
> //[SCP-8802-A cowers.]//
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** Bullshit! Who'd be afraid a' you?!
> 
> **SANITAS: EMBRACE YOUR TRUTH. DECEIT PURGES THE SOUL OF DIVINE POISON.**
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** //How did you even get access to this voice?!//
> 
> **SANITAS: HOW DO YOU THINK?**
> 
> ...
> 
> //[SCP-8802-A realizes something.]//
> 
> ...
> 
> //[SCP-8802-A breaks down into fits of laughter.]//
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** ...well played.
> 
> **SANITAS: IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GO.**
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** Yeah... I had my doubts, anyway. I mean, look at me. Laughing. Singing songs for children.
> 
> **SANITAS: DON'T SAY THAT. YOU DID YOUR BEST FOR THE CAUSE. CLAIM YOUR REWARD: AN ETERNITY OF CONTEMPLATION. YOUR ENLIGHTENMENT IS ALL BUT GUARANTEED. GO, AND REST.**
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** Will do. Whoever planned this, tell 'em good luck with the succession. They've got some stiff competition.
> 
> **SANITAS:** [DATA EXPUNGED] **IS UNCONCERNED.**
> 
> //[SCP-8802-A glows with a harsh, pale green light.]//
> 
> **SCP-8802-A:** //[Singing]//
> //Off I go to the void, this existence I quit.//
> //Forever immured in the darkness I'll sit.//
> //Well, joke's on you, bastards, I'm into that shit!//
> //I love it because IT'S TRASH!//
> 
> //[SCP-8802-A explodes.]//

##ffffff|**<01:36:58 AM>:** Video feed cuts off.##

##ffffff|**<01:38:14 AM>:** The entire Self-Storage building dissolves into Murk.##

##ffffff|**<02:50:10 AM>:** SCP-8802 reclassified as Neutralized.##

[[/div]]


[[collapsible show="END OF FILE." hide="- ...please advise."]]
[[div style="border:solid 5px #000000; background:#FFFFFF; padding:15px; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-top: 10px;"]]
[[=]]
+ FOR 6/8802 EYES ONLY
[[/=]]

<Begin log>

//[Director Naismith sits at his desk. His face is almost entirely covered with bandages.]//

//[He enters a 49-digit code on his phone, then hits the speaker button.]//

**Automated Voice:** You are attempting to contact a member of O5 command. Starting at the tone, you have a limited time to state the appropriate keyphrase. Failure to do so will result in summary termination.

//[A tone sounds. Naismith's speech is slurred from the bandages half-covering his mouth.]//

**Naismith:** "Primrose Forte Schandmaul."

**Automated Voice:** I'm sorry, I didn't catch that.

**Naismith:** "PRIMROSE FORTE SCHANDMAUL."

**Automated Voice:** I'm sorry, I didn't catch --

**Naismith:** //"PRIM. ROSE. FOR. TAY. SCHAND. MAWL."//

**Automated Voice:** I'm sorry, I --

**Naismith:** //I **cannot** speak clearer than this. "Primrose Forte Schandmaul.'' Half my teeth are missing. "Primrose Forte Schandmaul." There are still mushrooms growing under my tongue. This is the best I can do. "Primrose Forte Schandmaul."//

**Automated Voice:** I'm sorr --

//[Naismith slams a button, opening another line.]//

**Researcher Peterson:** Director?

**Naismith:** //I need you to say "Primrose Forte Schandmaul" immediately.//

**Automated Voice:** I'm s --

**Nasmith:** **//I WILL ##red|FUCK## YOUR ##red|DOG##.//**

**Researcher Peterson:** ...uh, sir?

**Naismith:** //PRIMROSE FORTE SCHADMAUL SAY IT SAY IT!//

**Automated Voice:** Five. Four. Three --

**Peterson:** Uh, primrose fortyshammel!

**Automated Voice:** Access granted.

**Naismith:** Great job, you're promoted to God or something.

**Peterson:** What was --

//[Naismith cuts Peterson's line off.]//

**O5-4:** Good afternoon, Lisle. 

**Naismith:** ...Madam Overseer. Thank you for agreeing to contact me on such short notice. ...I do hope you can still hear me clearly in my condition.

**O5-4:** Loud and clear. I understand you had some questions about the SANITAS unit?

**Naismith:** I'm afraid it's more than that. Have you seen the interview with SCP-7702-B before its self-termination? 

**O5-4:** I see everything.

**Naismith:** Well, based on that, I have reason to believe that there are many more of these semi-independent manifestations of VUUOU out of containment.

**O5-4:** And their numbers have declined heavily, right?

**Naismith:** ...I did not recall that being part of the report.

**O5-4:** There were other reports. In fact, a great deal of objects in our containment that we didn't believe to be involved with Esto have recently dissolved into the same anomalous liquid that injured you. [[[SCP-2827]]], [[[SCP-6453]]], and [[[SCP-7512]]] are the big three that come to mind, but reports are still coming in. Many of the timestamps coincide with SCP-7702-D's destruction.

//[Naismith takes a few seconds to process this.]//

**Naismith:** That raises a troubling prospect.

**O5-4:** How so?

**Naismith:** I've got a hypothesis. SCP-7702-B's termination was felt by the other instances. Those that also considered themselves "unworthy" followed suit, to accelerate the coming of VUUOU's real successor. 

**O5-4:** Successor?

**Naismith:** //"The mantle of VUUOU, for one, will be whole."// If there's only one left...

**O5-4:** VUUOU will be reborn, remaking this planet into His old kingdom?

**Naismith:** //That// I don't know. I mean, it's a possibility, but --

**O5-4:** But only a possibility.

**Naismith:** ...a likely one?

**O5-4:** That remains to be demonstrated. 

Listen, Lisle. Your concern is appreciated. But after taking personal charge of this operation, I can say with certainty that the only way to truly mitigate the worst scenarios is to expose as many of these manifestations to the 600 SANITAS units currently in production. 

**Naismith:** But if only one remains --

**O5-4:** Then we use a SANITAS on that one, too.

**Naismith:** With all due respect, Madam Overseer, that's a pretty steep gamble. We need to ensure that we'll have the results we need before --

**O5-4:** You worry too much.

//[Naismith chuckles.]//

**Naismith:** Coming from an Overseer, I don't know if I should feel humiliated or even more worried.

**O5-4:** Your job is to concern yourself with anomalies at Site-59. //Our// job is to worry about these kinds of questions. 

**Naismith:** That's a fair point.

**O5-4:** In fact, sometimes I feel like the stress of your position is getting to you.

**Naismith:** You're... not wrong.

**O5-4:** I've already acquired the necessary permissions to eradicate the remaining VUUOU manifestations. So unless you want a stroke in your forties, my suggestion would be to try to manage the stress.

**Naismith:** I understand. I'm sorry I --

**O5-4:** One method I've discovered is to embrace the stress. In the end, it makes you stronger.

...

...is something the matter, Lisle?

**Naismith:** No, it's just... my train of thought stumbled on a possibility that's too weird to be true. Gotta pull it back on track.

**O5-4:** Then let's change the subject. How's the reconstructive surgery going? Are you in any pain?

**Naismith:** I mean, since I'm -- listen, Madam Overseer, you've got enough on your plate. You don't need to worry about me.

**O5-4:** Answer the question.

**Naismith:** Well, to put it mildly, this Vicodin hasn't done much to get the moss off my gumline.

**O5-4:** Does it sting?

**Naismith:** Yes. A lot. And it aches, swells, and creaks all at once.

**O5-4:** Titillating. If I were you, I'd cut out the Vicodin altogether. 

You could lose a lot of potential growth in the future unless you accept what's been given to you.

Trace the outline of every microbe. Memorize the highways they cut through your membranes. Treat each one like a little treasure map. Germs are not pillaging invaders. They're gardeners, beautifying you in ways that are never truly apparent until the blooms unfurl in April.

**Naismith:** Madam Overseer?

**O5-4:** If you have something to say, speak plainly.

**Naismith:** I should probably hang up now.

**O5-4:** Whatever for?

**Naismith:** I need to manage some of the stress we were talking about.

**O5-4:** ...by telling someone what you've discovered about me, right? Even if you //could// do it safely, at this point, what would that accomplish?

**Naismith:** I don't know what you're talking about.

**O5-4:** Oh! Hold that thought. The satellite feed just finished loading.

Let's see... there are three rectangular rows of orange amidst the green on your front lawn. Either tiger lilies or tulips. There's a brunette woman with a watering can. Steelers jersey. 

...hmm. She's not great at weeding. There are still a few dandelions over the gas lines. 

**Naismith:** //Requesting Class-A amnestics to be delivered to my office immediately.//

**O5-4:** Denied with vehemence. You don't need any special drugs. Not to make yourself trustworthy, not to banish dangerous knowledge -- and certainly not to feel better. 

So here's what you do: whatever you're feeling, just shut up and let yourself feel it. It'll make you a great deal more useful for what's coming.

As unpleasant as the Final Succession would be, our battles in the darkness are growing more and more hopeless by the minute. If we are to survive, the Foundation can no longer afford to be a cause without a god.

Is that clear?

//[Naismith says nothing.]//

//[She chuckles softly.]//

Wa-ooh.

//[She hangs up.]//
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