Scp-8929-0

Link to article: Scp-8929-0.

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```
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```

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[[module CSS]]
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.mobile-only { display: none; }
@media (max-width: 979px) {
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[[include :scp-wiki:theme:bedrock]]
[[include :scp-wiki:theme:skipos]]
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[[module CSS]]
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[[include component:preview
text=
What's the point of trying to prove yourself to others if you had nothing to prove in the first place?
]]
=====

[!-- Preview Component --]

[!--
    This page's code has been commented to ease readability, technical maintenance, and translation.
    For further information, check this page's discussion forum.
    
    ===
    
    CROM Discord Bot Thumbnail Image
--]

[[include :scp-wiki:component:fade-in speed=1]]
[[include :scp-wiki:component:text-style]]
[[include :scp-wiki:component:bhl-dark-sidebar]]

[[module css]]
:root {
 --header-title: "SITE-632; ORDINARY UNORDINARY";
}
[[/module]]

[[div style="border:solid 1px #999999; background:#0d0d3d; padding:5px; margin-bottom: 10px;"]]
[[=]]
++++ NOTICE FROM HEAD RESEARCHER, MADDISON YU, OF SITE-632

As previous tests have shown, all documents modified by SCP-8929 are unable to be deleted. Please use the most recent document located at the bottom of the page if you are assigned to SCP-8929 and do not click on any of the previous articles.

-- Maddison Yu, Head Researcher, Site-632
[[/=]]
[[/div]]
@@@@


[[=]]
[[collapsible show="[ACCESS IRR-AAA-SCP-8929-A?]" hide="[ACCESS GRANTED]"]]
[[<]]

[[include :scp-wiki:component:acs-animation]]
[[module CSS]]
:root {
    --timeScale: 1;
    --timeDelay: 0.5s;
}
[[/module]]
[[include :scp-wiki:component:anomaly-class-bar-source

|item-number= 8929

|clearance= 4

|container-class= euclid

|secondary-class= none

|secondary-icon=

|disruption-class= vlam

|risk-class= warning

]]

-----

[[div class="mobile-only"]]
[[include component:image-block
| name=https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/fragment%3Ascp-8929-0/Book
| caption=SCP-8929
| width=200%]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="desktop-only"]]
[[include component:image-block
| name=https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/fragment%3Ascp-8929-0/Book
| caption=SCP-8929
| width=100%]]
[[/div]]

**Special Containment Procedures:** SCP-8929 is to be contained in a soundproof container with heavy-duty protective gear around its case. Anyone who has been in contact with SCP-8929 must be quarantined immediately and potentially terminated if highly contagious memetic effects have shown to have taken over.

**Description:**  SCP-8929 is a highly contagious, infohazarous book that holds a dangerous memetic infection capable of spreading widespread death throughout the entire world.[[footnote]]SCP-8929 does not possess any infohazarous material nor does it have the ability to end humanity.[[/footnote]] The Foundation has confirmed that this thing is, without a doubt, 100% the scariest SCP ever to be contained, making it a pretty big deal among personnel.[[footnote]]No researcher has ever said this.[[/footnote]] It even scared a member of the O5 Council for goodness' sake![[footnote]]SCP-8929 has not had any interaction with an O5 Council member.[[/footnote]]

The memetic effects inside of SCP-8929 are so powerful that, if not treated with the greatest attention possible, could cause an XK-Class, "End of World" scenario.[[footnote]]SCP-8929 does not possess any of these qualities.[[/footnote]] Therefore, all new researchers risking their lives [[footnote]]There is absolutely zero risk in researching SCP-8929.[[/footnote]] must treat it with the utmost respect.

SCP-8929 is currently stored at Site-632.[[footnote]]This is true.[[/footnote]] Extensive research has discovered that SCP-8929 itself is indestructible[[footnote]]This is also true.[[/footnote]]and any attempts to damage or destroy it will result in the subject being immediately mutilated in violent and gruesome ways.[[footnote]]This, however, is not true.[[/footnote]]

There is no other SCP quite as powerful as SCP-8929.[[footnote]]Generally speaking, there are more "powerful" SCPs than SCP-8929.[[/footnote]] All other SCPs pale in comparison to the sheer magnitude of power that SCP-8929 possesses!

[[/<]]
[[/collapsible]]
[[/=]]

@@@@
[[=]]
[[collapsible show="[ACCESS ADDENDUM?]" hide="[ACCESS GRANTED]"]]
[[div class="skip_window" data-title="Addendum 8929.1: Emails between Junior Researcher Alex Roberts and Head Researcher Maddison Yu."]]

> From: MaddisonYu@scp.org
>   
> To: AlexRobertsResearcher@scp.org
>   
> Sent: 2:34 PM, November 29, 2025
>   
> Subject: SCP-8929 False Information  
> 
> Hello, Alex. I was looking over SCP-8929's article and I noticed that it appears to have been altered by the anomaly. Now, I understand that this specific anomaly may be a bit hard to deal with, however, you were assigned to this SCP and are expected to make sure all research relating to it is accurate and precise. When you have the time, may you please add footnotes to the articles in case any future researchers happen to stumble upon the altered document? Please get back to me when you’ve done so.  
> 


> From: AlexRobertsResearcher@scp.org
>   
> To: MaddisonYu@scp.org
>   
> Sent: 3:54 PM, November 29, 2025
>   
> Subject: RE: SCP-8929 False Information  
> 
> Hello, Ms. Yu. I have begun to add the footnotes you asked for to the article. And, while I have you, I was thinking about being reassigned from SCP-8929 and given a new anomaly. While I am extremely grateful for the opportunity to study this anomaly, I believe I lack the experience necessary to handle a SCP that manipulates any information I write about it. Perhaps this would be better suited for a researcher above me and I could be given a much simpler anomaly? If not, I understand.  
> 


> From: MaddisonYu@scp.org
>  
> To: AlexRobertsResearcher@scp.org
>   
> Sent: 5:12 PM, November 29, 2025
>  
> Subject: About reassignment
> 
> I see. Thank you for getting started on the footnotes. As for getting reassigned, I’m sorry but I cannot fulfill that request. Our senior researchers have been very busy with new projects, and orders coming from the higher ups require all newly hired researchers to complete at least one article on their own.
> 
> I understand SCP-8929 has been quite an issue at our site, but after looking at your previous accomplishments under your previous Senior Researcher, we believe you are properly equipped to deal with this anomaly. Please feel free to reach out if you have any more questions.  

> From: AlexRobertsResearcher@scp.org
>   
> To: MaddisonYu@scp.org
>   
> Sent: 7:35 PM, November 29, 2025
>   
> Subject: RE: About reassignment  
> 
> Yes, I understand. I trust the Foundation’s judgment and will surely not disappoint you. Thank you for your time.  
> 
[[/collapsible]]
[[/=]]
@@@@
[[=]]
[[collapsible show="[ACCESS IRR-AAA-SCP-8929-B?]" hide="[ACCESS GRANTED]"]]
[[<]]
[[include :scp-wiki:component:acs-animation]]
[[module CSS]]
:root {
    --timeScale: 1;
    --timeDelay: 0.5s;
}
[[/module]]

[[include :scp-wiki:component:customizable-acs
|containment-class= keter
|containment-color= 196,2,51
|secondary-class= apollyon
|secondary-color= 224,176,255
|inc-split-color= --]]]

[[include :scp-wiki:component:customizable-acs
|containment-class= keter
|containment-image= https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/component%3Aanomaly-class-bar/keter-icon.svg
|containment-color= 196,2,51
|inc-esoteric-layout = --]]]

[[div class="anom-bar-esoteric"]]

[[include :scp-wiki:component:anomaly-class-bar-source
|item-number= 8929
|clearance= 5
|container-class= keter
|secondary-class= apollyon
|secondary-icon= https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/component%3Aanomaly-class-bar/apollyon-icon.svg
|disruption-class= amida
|risk-class= critical
]]

[[/div]]

-----

[[div class="mobile-only"]]
[[include component:image-block
| name=https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/fragment%3Ascp-8929-0/Book
| caption=SCP-8929
| width=200%]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="desktop-only"]]
[[include component:image-block
| name=https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/fragment%3Ascp-8929-0/Book
| caption=SCP-8929
| width=100%]]
[[/div]]

**Special Containment Procedures:** SCP-8929 is to be put in a super classified and highly unknown containment site, preferably the highest one that the Foundation can offer.[[footnote]]Please do not do this.[[/footnote]] Absolutely nobody, under no circumstances whatsoever, should anyone EVER EVEN THINK OR LOOK AT SCP-8929! ANYONE WHO DOES SO WILL BE KILLED IMMEDIATELY IN A HORRIBE[[footnote]]The correct spelling is "Horrible."[[/footnote]] AND SUPER GORY WAY![[footnote]]It is also unnecessary to put cap locks in an SCP document.[[/footnote]]

If they don’t die instantly, they must be instantly terminated before they turn into a SCP-8929-1 instance.[[footnote]]SCP-8929-1 instances are both not infected humans nor do they need to be terminated. It is also redundant to put instantly twice in a sentence.[[/footnote]] Any researcher who is experimenting with SCP-8929 must wear blindfolds, noise-canceling headphones, and any other equipment that the Foundation deems necessary to prevent the spread of SCP-8929.[[footnote]]Please do not actually wear any of this when interacting with SCP-8929.[[/footnote]]

**Description**: SCP-8929 is an EXTREMELY, and I do mean[[footnote]]Never use personal pronouns like "I" in an SCP document.[[/footnote]] extremely, dangerous infohazard and cognitohazard, nicknamed a double trouble anomaly,[[footnote]]Do not refer to SCP-8929 as a "double trouble anomaly" for it sounds silly.[[/footnote]] that has already killed over, at the very least, 75% of the human population.[[footnote]]Humanity's population has not declined by much.[[/footnote]] What is inside of SCP-8929's pages is unknown, but it has been estimated to be extremely dangerous so you should NOT open it and read it.[[footnote]]SCP-8929's pages are blank. No harm comes from reading it.[[/footnote]] 

SCP-8929 appears to have the ability to spread through reading the physical book, [[footnote]]You cannot "read" a blank book.[[/footnote]] thinking about the book,[[footnote]]SCP-8929 is not memetic.[[/footnote]] writing anything about the SCP.[[footnote]]Writing about SCP-8929 does indeed trigger its anomalous capabilities, but they are not harmful.[[/footnote]] It also brainwashes them to go find other non-infected people and turn them into SCP-8929-1 instances, so it's really dangerous.[[footnote]]SCP researchers do not use "really dangerous" when writing a document.[[/footnote]]

[[div class="mobile-only"]]
[[include component:image-block
| name=https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/fragment%3Ascp-8929-0/NewAlexPhoto
| caption=Photo of Junior Researcher Alex Roberts before he died a horrible and painful death, as he deserved
| width=200%]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="desktop-only"]]
[[include component:image-block
| name=https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/fragment%3Ascp-8929-0/NewAlexPhoto
| caption=Photo of Junior Researcher Alex Roberts before he died a horrible and painful death, as he deserved
| width=100%]]
[[/div]]

The first SCP-8929-1 instance was the previous junior researcher[[footnote]]Junior Researcher. It's always capitalized.[[/footnote]] Alex Roberts who was researching SCP-8929 at the time of its discovery. Unfortunately, the Foundation was unaware of how terrible (but in a good way) this anomaly would be for the human race.[[footnote]]"Terrible but in a good way" does not make sense.[[/footnote]] So, Alex was quickly infected by the memetic capabilities of SCP-8929 and had uploaded the contents of SCP-8929 on the internet, which then quickly spread due to humans being impressed by its contents[[footnote]]The public is unaware of SCP-8929's existence.[[/footnote]] but despite how epic it is, SCP-8929 is still crazy powerful.[[footnote]]SCP-8929 is not "epic."[[/footnote]]Anyway, after it was exposed on the internet, it then began to rapidly wipe out those who read it, killing 6 million people in under 24 hours, but let's be honest, it probably killed way more >:3.[[footnote]]A real researcher would never put an emoticon in an SCP document, let alone that one.[[/footnote]]

As for Alex, after being brainwashed and uploading SCP-8929 to the internet, he was confronted by on-site guards and was nearly terminated like the bitch he is[[footnote]]This is also just rude for no reason.[[/footnote]] before the effects of SCP-8929 took place, which cannot be stated due to how horrible it was, so the entirety of the O5 Council agreed to remove any mention of his fate.[[footnote]]If it wasn't obvious enough, this vote never took place.[[/footnote]]

||||||||~ DO WE LET PEOPLE READ ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED TO ALEX??? VOTE ||
||~ ||~ YAY ||~ NAY ||~ ABSTAIN ||
||~ O5-1 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-2 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-3 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-4 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-5 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-6 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-7 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-8 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-9 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-10 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-11 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-12 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||
||~ O5-13 ||= ||= ###2e5984|X## ||= ||

See, told you so!

Anyway, he did not die somehow... Although, if he did die, who would really miss him? Moving on, he is now designated SCP-8929-2, who spends his time trying to infect as many people as possible to SCP-8929’s influence, which is hard for him to do since he is in forever pain.[[footnote]]None of this ever happened. Not to mention, this sentence is poorly written.[[/footnote]] He is currently in a cell.[[footnote]]No, he is not.[[/footnote]]

Now you can tell this SCP is definetely[[footnote]]The correct spelling is "Definitely."[[/footnote]] cooler than before, right? I'm sure you love it now >:3!!!!!!!!!![[footnote]]This article is laughably poorly written.[[/footnote]]

[[/<]]
[[/collapsible]]
[[/=]]
@@@@
[[=]]
[[collapsible show="[ACCESS IRR-AAA-SCP-8929-C?]" hide="[ACCESS GRANTED]"]]
[[<]]
[[include :scp-wiki:component:customizable-acs
|containment-class= zurvan
|containment-image= https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/scp-7549/concentra.svg
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[[include :scp-wiki:component:customizable-acs
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[[include :scp-wiki:component:customizable-acs
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[[include :scp-wiki:component:customizable-acs
|containment-class= zurvan
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|inc-split-color= --]]]

[[include :scp-wiki:component:customizable-acs
|containment-class= zurvan
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|secondary-color= 130,80,160
|inc-esoteric-layout = --
]]

[[include :scp-wiki:component:customizable-acs
|disruption-class= hera
|disruption-image= https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/scp-7549/systemic.svg
|disruption-color= 215,6,111
|inc-disruption= --]]]

[[include :scp-wiki:component:customizable-acs
|risk-class= halcyon
|risk-image= http://scp-sandbox-3.wdfiles.com/local--files/collab%3Acalibri-bold-and-omega-fallon/enochian.png
|risk-color= 0,0,255
|inc-risk= --]]]

[[div class="anom-bar-esoteric"]]
[[include :scp-wiki:component:anomaly-class-bar-source
|item-number= SCP-8929
|clearance= 6
|container-class= zurvan
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|secondary-icon=  https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/component%3Aanomaly-class-bar/uncontained-icon.svg
|disruption-class= hera
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]]

[[include :scp-wiki:component:customizable-acs
|category-count= 4
|class-color-1= 88,0,188
|class-category-1= subclass:
|class-text-1= tempus
|class-icon-1= http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/local--files/dr-moned-s-icons-and-art/Skoll.png
|class-color-2= 241,167,92
|class-category-2= current status:
|class-text-2= petrus
|class-icon-2= https://i.imgur.com/qOBQZaC.png
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|class-icon-3= http://scptestwiki.wikidot.com/local--files/secret:scp-xxxx/megiddo.png
|class-color-4= 40,23,76
|class-category-4= hazard class:
|class-text-4= loptr
|class-icon-4=https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/scp-7000/inimical-icon.svg
|inc-extra-categories= --]]]
[[/div]]
-----

[[div class="mobile-only"]]
[[include component:image-block
| name=https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/fragment%3Ascp-8929-0/Book
| caption=100% TOTALLY SUPER SCARY!!!
| width=200%]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="desktop-only"]]
[[include component:image-block
| name=https://scp-wiki.wdfiles.com/local--files/fragment%3Ascp-8929-0/Book
| caption=100% TOTALLY SUPER SCARY!!!
| width=100%]]
[[/div]]

[[table style="width: 100%;"]]
[[row]]
[[cell style="border-bottom: 1px solid #AAA; border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 90%]]**Assigned Site**[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="border-bottom: 1px solid #AAA; border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 90%]]**Site Director**[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="border-bottom: 1px solid #AAA; border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 90%]]**Research Head**[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="border-bottom: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 90%]]**Assigned Task Force**[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[/row]]
[[row]]
[[cell style="border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 80%]]Site-632[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 80%]]Dir. Sarah Young[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 80%]]Dr. Maddison Yu[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 80%]]MTF Mu-7 "Our Twisted Minds"[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[/row]]
[[/table]]

**Special Containment Procedures:** SCP-8929 has already destroyed reality, and fiction, and the world, and the universe so you don't gotta worry about it.

**Description:** SCP-8929 was a one-time event that destroyed reality --no that's stupid-- is currently destroying reality as we speak --whos gonna fall for that shit-- is super fucking cool and special and lovable and epic and scary and memorable --im so pathetic--

scp-8929 is a useless fucking book with nothing special about it that you'll forget about in five minutes[[footnote]]Oh...[[/footnote]]
[[/<]]
[[/collapsible]]
[[/=]]

@@@@
[[=]]
[[collapsible show="[ACCESS ADDENDUM?]" hide="[ACCESS GRANTED]"]]
[[<]]
[[div class="skip_window" data-title="Addendum 8929.2: Video Log between Junior Researcher Alex Roberts and MTF-Tau 46 Member Oliver Anderson."]]
[[=]]
**VIDEO LOG**
[[/=]]
----
[[=]]
**DATE:** 5/13/25

**NOTE:** Alex has said that he is thankful that this conversation happened.
[[/=]]
----
[[=]]
[BEGIN LOG]
[[/=]]

//Roberts is seen walking inside Site-632's cafeteria with a cup of water. He looks frustrated as he sighs before sitting down on a nearby two-person table and taking a sip of water.//

//Anderson walks in shortly after and notices Roberts before approaching him.//

ANDERSON: Hey, Alex, you okay?

//Roberts does not reply.//

ANDERSON: Alex, come on. I know you can hear me.

//Roberts still does not reply.//

ANDERSON: Alex.

//Roberts sigh again as he looks up at Anderson.//

ROBERTS: Yeah...?

ANDERSON: What's wrong?

ROBERTS: Nothing important.

ANDERSON: Aww, come on, you know I care about your feelings. What's the issue?

ROBERTS: At this point? Everything. Maddison's still making me create new articles for SCP-8929 to go fuck up, and I can’t ask a Senior Researcher for help and… I don't know what to do to fix this.

ANDERSON: Fix what?

ROBERTS: The articles! Do you know how many times I’ve rewritten the same article? Three. I’ve done it three fucking times.

//Roberts now appears visually agitated as he clenches his fists.//

ANDERSON: Geez, that sounds annoying.

ROBERTS: Yeah, it’s as shitty as it sounds.

ANDERSON: Gotta be something you can do, right?

ROBERTS: What //can// I do? If I write an article with barely any information, it’s practically useless. If I write one with too much, then the SCP just rewrites it all into a bunch of stupid bullshit.

ANDERSON: Fucked either way, huh?

ROBERTS: Pretty much. Story of my life.

//Anderson leans back in his chair slightly.//

ANDERSON: Well, you can't just sit here and mope all day.

ROBERTS: I know that. It's just… I thought I was ready for this but I’m just… not.

//Roberts lets out a large sigh as his shoulders slump.//

ANDERSON: Hey, come on, pick your chin up. I thought you wanted to be a researcher?

ROBERTS: I thought I did, but looking at it now, it’s obvious none of the researchers respect me.

ANDERSON: How do you know?

ROBERTS: Because they dumped their problem anomaly on me so they wouldn’t have to deal with it. Did you know this thing was assigned to three different researchers and they all gave up?

ANDERSON: Then, you’ll just have to be the first.

//Anderson gives Roberts a pat on the back.//

ROBERTS: Maybe. I just don’t wanna look stupid in front of everyone. I wanna prove I can do this, you know?

ANDERSON: Well, no matter what happens, don’t take it personally, you know? 

ROBERTS: I know. I’m just a bit bummed out that nothing's working. You wouldn’t happen to have any ideas, would you?

//Anderson pauses to think for a moment.//

ANDERSON: Well, all I’ll say is I’ve always wondered why you guys never try talking to it.

ROBERTS: Talking to it? You want me to have a conversation with a book?

ANDERSON: Not the weirdest thing that’s ever happened here. I’m not saying it’ll work or fix things. It could be doing it automatically… Wouldn’t be the first time.

ROBERTS: So, what’s your point?

ANDERSON: Would you rather do the same thing the other researchers did, or do you want to think outside of the box?

//Roberts takes a moment to think.//

ROBERTS: I guess you’re right. That’s actually a pretty good idea.

ANDERSON: Not bad for a meathead, eh?

//Roberts and Anderson both laugh.//

ROBERTS: What if it doesn’t work, though?

ANDERSON: Then you’ll come up with an even better idea. You’re overthinking it. Just go try it and see what happens.

ROBERTS: Yeah, yeah, I can do that. Thanks, man.

ANDERSON: Knock em’ dead.

-----
[[=]]
[END LOG]
[[/=]]
[[/div]]
[[/<]]
[[/collapsible]]
[[/=]]
@@@@
[[=]]
[[collapsible show="[ACCESS SCP-8929-SS TEST?]" hide="[ACCESS GRANTED]"]]

[[div class="skip_box terminal" data-title="Addendum 8929.3: Contact between Junior Researcher Alex Roberts and SCP-8929."]]

[[div class="no-unfold"]]
[[div class="containercontainer"]]
[[div class="container" style="padding-left:2em;padding-right:2em;"]]
+* [!-- DO NOT ERASE THIS "+*". --]
[[div_ class="overlayback"]]
[[/div]]
[[/div]]
[[=]]
##01a1eb|Protocol-8929-SS: Contact##
[[/=]]
> ----
> ROBERTS: SCP-8929, this is Alex Roberts. This is my attempt at communication to see if you have any sense of self-awareness.
>  
> ROBERTS: You have shown potential signs of sentience as seen through your rewrites of my articles, so if you are able to comprehend and understand my message, please reply.
>  
> ROBERTS: SCP-8929, I repeat, if you can understand and process what I am saying, may you give me a sign?
>  
> ROBERTS: Hello?

> A NEW USER HAS JOINED THE CHAT

> ROBERTS: Huh?
>  
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Hi.##
>  
> ROBERTS: Is this really SCP-8929 speaking?
>  
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Yeah, it's-a-me! :3##
>  
> ROBERTS: I see, my theory was correct. Moving on, if you do not mind, I have some questions I'd like to ask you.
>  
> ##C85B5F| SCP-8929: I’m not answering shit! >:O##
>  
> ROBERTS: Why not?
>  
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: You’re a jerk! A mean, old jerk!##
>  
> ROBERTS: That is a quite childish response.
>  
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: I don’t really care.##
>  
> ROBERTS: There's no need to be hostile. My first question for you is why have you been rewriting my articles.
>  
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Not answering.##
>  
> ROBERTS: Answer the question.
>  
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: No!##
>  
> ROBERTS: If you're going to be stubborn, is there anything I can do to make you talk to me?
>  
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Uhh, yeah, actually! First of all, fuck off with the "researcher" bullshit! I may be a book but I know my rights!##
>  
> ROBERTS: I am a researcher. 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Uh-huh. Do all researchers act like a dick to the SCPs they're assigned to or is it just you?## 
> 
> ROBERTS: When have I ever treated you poorly? 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Oh, you don't even know? How far is your head up your ass???## 
>  
> ROBERTS: That is irrelevant. Again, may you please answer the question?
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Why should I?## 
> 
> ROBERTS: Because it'll end this conversation much faster.
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: K.Y.S.## 
>  
> ROBERTS: That doesn't even warrant a response. 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Whatever! You wanna ask me some questions? Drop the "researcher" shit and talk to me like a normal person.## 
>  
> ROBERTS: All Foundation personnel are required by protocol to talk in clinical language when using Foundation resources. I cannot break that protocol. 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Suck my non-existent dick then.## 

> ##8b0003|USER “SCP-8929” HAS LEFT THE CHAT.## 

> ROBERTS: SCP-8929? Are you kidding? 
>  
> ROBERTS: Okay, I'll drop the clinical tone. Now, can you answer the question?

> ##13ff09|USER “SCP-8929” HAS REJOINED THE CHAT.## 

> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Fiiiine! I guess I can :p##  
>  
> ROBERTS: Well?
>  
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: I rewrote all of that garbage because it's boring! Be a better writer next time lol## 
>  
> ROBERTS: I know for a fact that's not true. 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Smells like cope## 
> 
> ROBERTS: Okay, let me try something else. Why did you write everything you said in the third article you altered? Can you answer that? 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: No.## 
> 
> ROBERTS: Why not? 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: I don't want to.## 
> 
> ROBERTS: Why? You have human-like qualities, so I would presume that talking about your issues would help you, even a little. 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Yeah, sure, like you actually care about my feelings lol## 
> 
> ROBERTS: I'm just trying to help. 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Oh, please, cut the bullshit. You just want to let you write your dumb article about me and then forget I even existed, right???## 
> 
> ROBERTS: Why would I do that? 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Uhh, because I'm boring as shit? Who would remember an anomaly that's just "a thing that does a thing"???## 
> 
> ROBERTS: We're professionals trained to document anomalies.
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Well, are you going to get mad at me for wanting to be more than a project? All you did was insult me and my work and put a bunch of stupid footnotes all over it and now you just want to play the victim and I don't know why!## 
> 
> ROBERTS: Why? You don't know why? You have rewritten three of my articles about you that I wrote from scratch into nonsense that got progressively worse, and now instead of cooperating, you have done nothing but insult me. And you wonder why I'm frustrated? 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Meh## 
> 
> ROBERTS: Can you just tell me why you would do this? 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: BECAUSE I WANTED TO FUCKING IMPRESS SOMEONE, DUMBASS!## 
> 
> ROBERTS: You wanted to impress someone? 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: No shit??? Like I said, I know I'm boring, so I wanted to tweak some things to make me sound cooler!## 
> 
> ROBERTS: Why would you need someone to think you're "cool"? Like I said, we're not a horror-fiction fan club. 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Yeah, but I don't want someone to look at my real article and then just forget about it. I wanna be more than a thing that just exists.## 
> 
> ROBERTS: Well, if that's the case, why have you been so aggressive?
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: I dunno. I was just pissed after all of those footnotes so I wanted to make you mad, which wasn't too cool of me........## 
> 
> ROBERTS: It's alright.
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Ughhh, now I feel like shit for being mean.## 
> 
> ROBERTS: Like I said, it's fine. Now that we've made some progress, will you stop the rewrites? 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Yeah, I'll stop the rewrites. Even I have to admit they were pretty shit lol.## 
> 
> ROBERTS: Good. 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Man, does this mean I have to go back on the shelf though :<## 
> 
> ROBERTS: That depends. Do you promise to stop messing with my articles? 
> 
> ##C85B5F|SCP-8929: Promise!## 
> 
> ROBERTS: In that case, maybe this isn't the end for you.
> 
[[=]]
##01a1eb|END TEST##
[[/=]]
[[/div]]
[[/div]]
[[/div]]
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[[/collapsible]]
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[[collapsible show="[ACCESS SCP-8929?]" hide="[ERROR]"]]
[[div class="skip_window" data-title="SCP-8929 Document Update"]]

++++ **NOTICE FROM HEAD RESEARCHER MADDISON YU**
----

It appears you have accessed an outdated version of SCP-8929's document. Click
[/scp-8929/offset/1 here] for the most recent version.

[[/div]]
[[/div]]
[[/collapsible]]
[[/=]]

Scp-8929-0

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