Link to article: Authpageophage (non hibibli version).
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[[include theme:black-highlighter-theme]] [[>]] [[module rate]] [[/>]] + **POI #2001-WAT** **Description:** Subject appears to be a human male. Subject is a member of the Serpent's Hand, and appears to be particularly adept at stealing docu- You know what, to hell with this. I can't afford to steal //all// my writing styles from [[*user Crashington]]. Let's do this again, shall we? . . . + **So who is N_Aepic_Fael?** Well, according to word of god, he's a bit of an idiot, so that's to be expected. After all, what kind of wri- Nope, damnit, I'm stealing from [[*user TheMightyMcB]] now. . . . Can I do anything without stealing? * ... Eh, author avatars are out of favor, and I don't feel like stealing from [[*user RockTeethMothEyes]] * If I'm too serious, I'll be stealing from [[*user qntm]] * If I'm too flamboyant, I'll be stealing from [[*user ROUNDERHOUSE]] Looks like there's only one thing left to- Fuck, I'm stealing from the Wondertainment Proposal now. //Fuck.// You know what? To hell with this. . . . **Item Number:** SCP-CRANKYBASTARD **Object Class:** Safe **Special Containment Procedures:** Ignore if possible, for subject will rant needlessly when given the chance. Subject demands snuggles from [http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-4966 SCP-4966] on an ungodly basis on ScipNet as user **naepicfael**. Researchers are encouraged to infuriate the subject by incorrectly spelling their ScipNet name, or calling them any name that begins with V, provided that it is not "Victor." After all, Victor is not real. **Description:** SCP-CRANKYBASTARD is some fool we picked up from ScipNet. Subject is apparently a thief, but most of the documents recovered didn't even belong to us, so that's a blessing, I suppose. Hopefully the fool doesn't have any more classified documents on him. . . . Wait, I just stole from [[*user LordStonefish]]. fUCk- [[tabview]] [[tab Recovered Documents]] [http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-4958 SCP-4958: You Are Loved] [[collapsible show="+ Comments" hide="- Comments"]] Damnit [[*user Crashington]], you were supposed to let this one fester! Anyways, first SCP article I ever wrote onto the mainsite, whose execution I //absolutely// butchered. Foundation send SCP Psychiatrists to deal with shitty relationships marked by a bored god. Funnily enough, this was actually my third article on the wiki, right after I Don't Want to Know Anymore and That Fucking Bug, and only this survived [[/collapsible]] ---- [http://www.scp-wiki.net/rock-war-rock-war ROCK WAR! ROCK WAR!] [[collapsible show="+ Comments" hide="- Comments"]] Hell yeah, baby, it's ROCK WAR time! I've said it dozens of times before, and I'll say it again, my favorite article I've written as of yet. SH gives social commentary on battle royales involving literal rocks. Not golems made of rocks, no. That would be boring. **I AM THE ROCK GOD, AND [[*user rattles]] IS MY PROPHET.** [[/collapsible]] ---- [http://www.scp-wiki.net/mother-who-demands-ones-toes Karcist Halyna Ieva, or The Mother Who Demands One's Toes] A collaboration with [[*user TheMightyMcB]] [[collapsible show="+ Comments" hide="- Comments"]] Listen, we all knew it was coming. It's toe mama. //Sigh...// Christ guys, you really won't let my jokes die, will you? Sarkic lady with no toes acts as a tool of the Archons and pisses off literally everyone around her, including her fellow Nalka. I'd include the symbol over the "a" but that'd imply I actually have standards here. [[/collapsible]] ---- [http://www.scp-wiki.net/another-soul-joins-the-halkost Another Soul Joins the Halkost] A collaboration with [[*user TheMightyMcB]] [[collapsible show="+ Comments" hide="- Comments"]] Toe Mama can't be killed, bitches. McB and I are planning on turning MWDOT into a canon/GOI, or at least a tag. Why? Fuck if I know. I blame [[*user XilasCrowe]]. I always have, and I always will. [[/collapsible]] ---- [http://www.scp-wiki.net/thank-you-reviewers Thank You, Reviewers] [[collapsible show="+ Comments" hide="- Comments"]] A thank you to everyone who takes the time to review other people's works. If nothing else, it's also a metaphor for the struggle people have with writing - something that many, many people can relate to. **Once again, thank you. All of you.** [[/collapsible]] ---- [http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-2410 SCP-2410: We Are Beary Sorry] A collaboration with [[*user Crashington]] and [[*user TheMightyMcB]] [[collapsible show="+ Comments" hide="- Comments"]] Ah, the pinnacle of the Triumvirate. I don't like taking credit for the last note, but I'll soak up in any glory that I can get. [[/collapsible]] ---- [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/et-ecce Et Ecce Equus Pallidus] A collaboration with [[*user MalyceGraves]] [[collapsible show="+ Comments" hide="- Comments"]] How I wish I contributed more to this timeline. [[/collapsible]] ---- [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/zaijian Retirement Letter] [[collapsible show="+ Comments" hide="- Comments"]] A eulogy to five years on the wiki, posted before five years have passed because of course it was. [[/collapsible]] [[/tab]] [[tab Characters]] + **Nevryn Aepiculus Faelligan:** Our dear idiot, he who pissed off eldritch abominations, he who was supposed to be my author avatar but [[*user Crashington]] beat me to the chase. Typical thief, stupid and cocky, but also has a small amount of common sense. More than Alabaster, at least. ---- + **Ganymede:** A lich? //Le gasp!// Did I steal from [[*user RockTeethMothEyes?]] Probably. The most level-headed one, he's also a bit of a cockwit. An undead mage, yes, and also a teacher. {I'm getting some serious self-insert vibes here...} ---- + **Alabaster Stahlsbeird:** Did I spell this idiot's name right? In any case, he's that cranky uncle that wants nothing more than to kill flesh. He raided somebody's tomb to get some dusty as fuck weapon. Also, has a metal skeleton and shit, but no one cares. ---- + **Halyna Ieva:** You know what, I'm not even going to bother trying to describe her. > One of the first things that children learn is equivalence. If a girl dares hurt someone? She gets punished. If a boy dares insult someone? Punishment. Toes, I believe, are the ultimate insult - something so infuriatingly useless, yet so priceless. After all, we are only born with a set amount of them. We revile those who lack toes as we do who lack limbs, for the infirm are incapable of performing work at an ideal pace. Why, then, can I not exact my vengeance on those who have what I cannot? Ye who mock the toeless, understand that I will come and harvest thy appendages to exact equivalence. You cannot discriminate if no one is different. ~ Ieva For all further inquiries about MWDOT, please refer to [[*user TheMightyMcB]] or [[*user XilasCrowe]]. I'm not nearly as invested as those two are. [[/tab]] [[tab Check These Guys Out!]] Some of my favorite authors. Will be updated as I get less and less lazy, and more and more people show up. Me am lazy, so me will steal from [[*user Crashington]]'s author page and add later. [http://www.scp-wiki.net/poi-3181-198-file ENTER HERE] In all seriousness, the list from his page is down here: ||~ User ||~ Author Page || || [[*user DevonMartin]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/devons-den || || [[*user DarkStuff]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/dr-k-stuff-s-personnel-file || || [[*user T Rutherford]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/t-rutherford-author-page || || [[*user Nameless Mediocre]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/nameless-and-mediocre || || [[*user Laneous]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/laneous-s-outlet || || [[*user oboebandgeek99]] || http://scp-wiki.net/oboebandgeek99 || || [[*user rounderhouse]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/rounderhouse-s-author-page || || [[*user TheMightyMcB]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/themightymcb-s-author-page || || [[*user MaliceAforethought]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/maliceaf-author-ght || || [[*user NatVoltaic]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/watts-maxwell-personnel-files || || [[*user Mortos]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/mortos-author-page || || [[*user ManyMeats]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/manymeats || || [[*user RockTeethMothEyes]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/researcher-mathias-s-colleague-protocol || || [[*user Weryllium]] || http://www.scp-wiki.net/weryl-wrote-stuff-come-look || [[/tab]] [[/tabview]] And yes, I stole that title from Veiedhimaedr (and Crashington by extension). 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