Lerche's Merchant Shop & Inn

Link to article: Lerche's Merchant Shop & Inn.

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[[include :scp-wiki:theme:basalt darkmode=a]]

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[[=image Dr%20Lerche%20Heraldry.png width="500px"]]

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[[include :scp-wiki:component:coltop show=+Open the door|hide=-The sound of a door bell chiming signals your arrival.]]


**Greetings traveler! Welcome to my humble shop.**

//You walk towards the counter where the enigmatic man awaits. His face is obscured by what looks like a bird mask.//

**You seem weary friend. Here, have a drink.**

[[=]]
[[size 150%]][[collapsible show="Take the drink" hide="Your thirst has been quenched."]][[/size]]
**Great. Looking better already.**
[[/collapsible]]
[[/=]]


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**Alright. Now relax and make yourself at home.** 
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**It has been a quiet day today, so how about we have some music? We have a jukebox over here.**
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//The merchant points to a nearby jukebox to his right.//

**Your choice, my friend.**

[[=]]
[[size 150%]][[collapsible show="Use the jukebox" hide="You see a playlist of tracks to choose from."]][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8WeE9AisvMY Track 1][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTeUdtilREo Track 2][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wF-OFm34G4U Track 3][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kq93lzDuiKQ Track 4][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LX5ToaaOWUY Track 5][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-diB65scQU Track 6][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZ2PtEx9-ls Track 7][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZLlfPg7pzE Track 8][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0b-eW8i8TVc Track 9][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UngXu2zwF9E Track 10][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=taj1GJTo6CE Track 11][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zEaKQqtzxJM Track 12][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ndBII9d6GsY Track 13][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YtPFAyy2HU Track 14][[/size]]

[[size 150%]][https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSseR0SOnGY Track 15][[/size]]
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**Alright. If you'd like some shut eye, we have an inn next door just down this corridor.**
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//The merchant points to your left to an adjacent corridor.//
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**Now, I'll be right back and then you can just check in here.**

**Take a look around and see what you like.**

**If you need anything, press the bell at the counter.**

**Oh! And do behave yourself friend.**
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//The merchant leaves into the room behind the counter. The sound of the door shutting echoes throughout the chamber.//
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//You look around. There are various items on sale.//
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[[size 150%]][[collapsible show="Food and Water" hide="You check out the section"]][[/size]]
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//Various containers of dry foods and edible liquids are displayed.//
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[[/collapsible]]

[[size 150%]][[collapsible show="Tools and Supplies" hide="You check out the section"]][[/size]]
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//Various tools, equipment, and crafting supplies are displayed here.//
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[[/collapsible]] 

[[size 150%]][[collapsible show="Pharmacy" hide="You check out the section"]][[/size]]
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//Medicine, bandages, and herbs are cleanly stored.//
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[[/collapsible]]

[[size 150%]][[collapsible show="Harmacy" hide="You check out the section"]][[/size]]
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//Various firearms are displayed on racks. There doesn't seems to be any ammo.//

//You also find various melee weapons and accessories.//
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[[/collapsible]]

[[size 150%]][[collapsible show="Exotic Animal Catalog" hide="You read the product catalog"]][[/size]]
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//You see various strange creatures for sale, apparently obtained through the merchant's extensive travels.//

//The "Pugrilla" especially catches your attention.//
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[[/collapsible]]


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//As you check out the items, you notice something in the corner of your eye.//
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//To your right you notice a ##ffbf00|posh looking curtain##. Its embroidery almost seems to draw you in. Curious, you look toward the counter. The merchant is still out of sight. You amble towards the curtain.//

[[div class="gold-collapse"]]
[[size 150%]][[collapsible show="Pull open the curtain" hide="A bookshelf of books is revealed"]][[/size]]

**AH! I see you have found those!**

//You quickly turn to see the merchant standing behind you. You both seemed to have frightened each other.//

**Those are stories I have procured throughout my travels. Each one is a treasure most valuable to me.**

**Would you like to take a look?**
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------
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> [[size 150%]] __The Assimilator__[[/size]]
> 
> https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-6357
> 
> An investigation into a livestock killer escalates into a game of chess between the vanguard of normalcy and an intelligent opponent.
@@ @@

> [[size 150%]]__Problem?__[[/size]]
> 
> https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-6661
> 
> A phenomena centering around a funny little drawing. The "Trollface"... I heard it is called.
@@ @@

> [[size 150%]]__The Hunter and The Hunted__[[/size]]
> 
> https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/the-hunter-and-the-hunted
> 
> A German tale of two strangers late at night with a monster on the prowl.
@@ @@

> [[size 150%]]__Lerche's Merchant Shop & Inn__[[/size]]
> 
> https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/lerche-s-merchant-shop-inn
> 
> ?
@@ @@

> [[size 150%]]__The Night Shift__[[/size]]
> 
> https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/the-night-shift
> 
> A Korean tale of a military coroner getting more than he bargained for one night at the barracks.
@@ @@

> [[size 150%]]__The Basilisk__[[/size]]
> 
> https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-6360
> 
> A case of a feathered beast residing in the Carpathians. I have had the pleasure of observing it in the wild once. Magnificent it was.
@@ @@

> [[size 150%]] __இரத்த ஆவி (Rattha Avi)__[[/size]]
> 
> https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/rattha-avi
> 
> An Indian tale of a missing kingdom, a band of drunk friends, and a sexton's long night. Some secrets are best left buried... as they say, heheh!
@@ @@

> [[size 150%]] __Ode to the Strawman__[[/size]]
> 
> https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-7332
> 
> A story of child abducting scarecrows in Czechoslovakia and a mother's quest to protect her son. Watched this with a fellow calling himself [[*user AnAnomalousWriter]]. Quite the jovial one indeed, friend!
@@ @@

> [[size 150%]] __Strigoi__[[/size]]
> 
> https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-7554
> 
> A detective mystery set in gangland UK involving some very special weaponry. A quality product I will say. Actually, I think we might have some for sale!
------

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**I do hope you enjoy them.**

//You continue looking around.//
[[/collapsible]]
[[/div]]
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[[size 150%]][[collapsible show=" Pictures" hide="You observe some pictures on the wall."]][[/size]]
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[[=image Assimilator%20Collage.jpg width="800px"]]
//"An ancient collage depicting The Assimilator, by the [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/dodos-arts-and-crafts-corner DodoDevil]"//
[[size 110%]][https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/dodos-arts-and-crafts-corner Contact Details][[/size]]
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[[=image Tau-15%20Vanguard%20Logo%20%28Black%20Background%29.png width="300px"]]

//"The emblem of Tau-15 "Vanguard": The first robotic fighting force. Designed and gifted to by [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/vivarium-s-artpage Lord Viva]."//
[[size 110%]][https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/vivarium-s-artpage Contact Details][[/size]]
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[[=image Dr%20Lerche%20Heraldry.png width="500px"]]
//"The Heraldry of Lerchehansa. Designed and gifted to by the [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/sleepofreason-creates-art SleepOfReason]."// 
[[size 110%]][https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/sleepofreason-creates-art Contact Details][[/size]]

[[/collapsible]]

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[[size 150%]][[collapsible show=" Testimonial" hide="You see what other travelers have to say about this establishment:"]][[/size]]
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> "The merchant is great! He would sell the finest wares and would be upfront with what the product is! He is also a good friend to make so please be nice to him."

[[*user BlueJones]], Lord Commander of the Knights Guild.
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> "This man definitely knew what he was talking about. His stock always has something useful, and for a great price at that!. Yeah, I'll be coming by again for sure."

[[*user Sirslash47]], Leader of the Alchemist Guild.
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> "There's no return policy, which I mean, the accepted currency is time so whatever but it's still kinda sus." 
>  "One star."

[[*user Marcelles_Raynes]], Professional dimension hopper.
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> "Me and my mimes stayed at the inn for a week, and the haunting moans from the previous denizens only bothered our sleep ONCE! 5 stars!"

[[*user fairydoctor]] of the Fairy Pranksters.
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> "The merchant is a most noble man. Tremendous fellow. Be sure to take your time when visiting, because this man won't let you leave before he has shown you all he has to offer." 

[[*user SleepOfReason]], Herald of the Realm.
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> "Very friendly eldritch monsters under the beds, as long as you give them leftovers."
> "5 stars."

[[*user hungrypossum]], Automaton tamer.
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> "The Merchant has a very fine collection of exotic animals, but there was a noticeable lack of decorum once the mimes checked in during my stay. Nevertheless, excellent services."

**Lord** [[*user Vivarium]], Archduke of the Realm.
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> "The Harmacy is stocked full of weapons I've never seen for sale before. I think one of them was literally just a live crocodile. Or was that one of the employees? Regardless, the ICBM performed wonderfully."
> "Five stars!"

[[*user Doctor Fullham]], Duke of Porkington.
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> "This is the finest establishment I've ever not been able to find my way out of!"

[[*user HarryBlank]], "Inauspicious individual."
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> "The digital food menu at the Inn's bar is impeccable. The Roasted RAM was delicious!" 

[[*user Tstaffor]], a computer program.
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> "The merchant has many strange wares. Strange, but useful."

[[*user GoldN4]], Saklovain citizen.
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> "The bird mask threw me off at first, but whatever drink the Merchant gave me was the best I've ever had!"

[[*user RoninTortoise]], Tortoise tamer.
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> "I staggered in from the wilderness from a world of darkness, and I was given shelter from the storm. All it cost me was my heart, soul, and sanity. Jokes on the merchant that crap's worthless. Can't wait to not leave!."

[[*user TheyCallMeTim]], Doorstop sweeper.
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> “Food was delectable and the beds were extremely soft! Oh! And the artifacts were okay I guess but tHE FOOD?!”

[[*user RadiantGold]], Professional Idiot.
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> "The Merchant has some great stories, I tell you that. Very entertaining indeed. On an unrelated note, I've so far bought a million jars of oil and stored them in my basement...Problem?"

[[*user winkwonkboi]], Second in Command of King CalcaRuler.
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>  "Oh, that ol' inn a small ways down from here? Yeah, the food's alright, I guess."

[[*user Parad00xx]], old man Jenkins.
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> "Tried some new potion. Must have passed out cause when I woke up I was displayed on the Harmacy rack. I think I may be stuck. 5.5 stars."

[[*user DrGooday]], Ruler of the Seven Rings, Epithet of the God of Death and Rot, Ender of Worlds. Part time cashier.
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>  "Mis-read the sign as 'Leches' Merchant Shop & Inn... was dissatisfied with the lack of milk. Great place regardless. 4/5"

[[*user JayKillBam]], world renowned Psychonaut.
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> "Got bitten by the pugrilla, innkeeper said it's alright, arm fell off anyway, can't complain."

[[*user cold_Nights]], Fourth-best tip-giver.
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> "I don't think I've actually bought anything from merchant store before, but today got a crate of .223 and a terrifying beast from the German woods. Sweet deal!"

[[*user Totooria]], Public Universal Friend.
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> "Great products at affordable prices, I only owe the merchant my firstborn child and half of the second one."

[[*user Mooagain]], "entrepreneur".
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> "Got dragged here in a dark wagon with a bag over my head, but the food was excellent. 4.5/5 stars." 

[[*user Kensing]], Scarecrow Representative.

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> "Went to the inn with my husband for a romantic getaway. When I woke up, my husband had been replaced by some other man who I had never met, but everyone insisted I'd always been married to. I've never been happier. Five stars!"

[[*user chaucer345]], Executive Editor of The Gazette.

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> "The pharmacy is full of wondrous medicines! The merchant was able to attach my assistant's head after a mishap occurred during a jousting tournament. Though she looks awfully pale..."

[[*user JAcerStriker]], The Supreme Soothsayer of the Seventh Sea.

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> "Outstanding service and high profit margins. 10/10 will supply anomalies to again." 

**N**[[*user Ecronak]], Bonafide lich and supplier of curiosities.

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> "Was going about 80 mph before I remembered I left my car at home, decided to stop here for a rest. Nice atmosphere." 

[[*user Harriet Farrar]], The Queen of the end. Daughter of the Ultra Nova.

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> "I get almost all of my lizards from here. I really love to sit in the café afterwards and see which ones are going to be ready."

[[*user Dr Balthazaar]], The Commodore.

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> "Extremely affordable food, great for my hordes of plague-infested hyenas! Would recommend to any warlords or -mongers!"

[[*user TopDownUnder]], Scourge of the South (Self-Proclaimed).
[[/collapsible]]
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[[collapsible show="_" hide=" That's a restricted area. Please do not go there."]]
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[[include :scp-wiki:component:coltop show=+You go behind the counter|hide=- You're not supposed to look there]]
Records:

[[module ListPages created_by="Dr Lerche" separate="no" order="created" prependLine="||~ Article ||~ Rating ||~ Comments ||~ Last Comment ||"]]
|| %%title_linked%% || %%rating%% || %%comments%% || %%commented_at%% by %%commented_by%% ||
[[/module]]

//You also find ammo boxes underneath.//

Notice:
> Explosives are not available in shop. 
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> You are required to make special orders.

[[include component:coltop show=+ You open the door to the room|hide=- I warn you friendo, do not ent...]]
//The door opens to what appears to be a storage room filled with chests and crates, along with more ammunition. It leads into a corridor.//

//The merchant protests behind you.//

[[include component:coltop show=+ You walk down the corridor|hide=_ ]]
You notice something at the end of the corridor. 

//On the floor is a familiar symbol.// 

//You go down to feel it, soon realising it is embossed on some kind of hatch. After feeling around, you find the handle.//

[[include component:coltop show=+ You open the trapdoor|hide=- It's empty]]
//You feel a prick on your neck. You pull out a dart. Dizziness sets upon you as you turn to see the merchant calmly tucking in a blowpipe. You desperately try get the figure, but your movements are slow. Delirium begins to set in as the figure saunters towards you. His mask now looks uncannily realistic. In the confusion, you move back just a little too far off the edge of the trapdoor and lose balance. You tumble in as the last thing you see is the merchant standing above the hole.//

**Du Doch Nicht!!**

//The merchant states.//

//He calmly walks down the steps to help himself to the spoils of war, taking anything of value and discarding the rest.//

//He sighs as he comes back up and shuts the trapdoor, leaving your body in the dark underbelly of the building.//

//After storing the loot in one of the many storage chests, the merchant goes back to the counter.//

//He reaches for the telephone to make a call to some friends. They will swiftly deal with the interloper.//

//Once done, he straightened himself up, and sat back at his counter...as the chiming of the door bell greets him.//

>**##green|Greenlight##**

[[include component:colend]]
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[[/collapsible]]

[[include component:colend]]

Lerche's Merchant Shop & Inn

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