Link to article: Researcher Pie's Personnel File.
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[[div class="content-panel standalone series" style="background-color: #FFFFFF;"]] ----- [[>]] [[module Rate]] [[/>]] ----- [[include :scp-wiki:component:image-features-source |hover-enlarge=--] |enlarge-amount=6 |speed=250 |float=true |align=right |width=300px |url=researcherpie.jpg |add-caption=true |caption=Janitor Pie kindly posing for the camera following Incident Pie-58. ]] **Name:** [REDACTED] Pie **Security Clearance:** 1 (Janitor) **Current Assignment:** --Reorganize breakroom refrigerator-- Assignment has since been altered due to Incident Pie-58. Assignment is now to flutter aimlessly around any LED lightbulb located within the Awing of Site-81. **Site of Operations:** [http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/secure-facility-dossier-site-81 Site-81] **Profile:** Pie, known as Researcher Pie to those who may pity him, is nothing more than a janitor within the A wing of Site-81. Reports state that Pie is friendly to his colleagues and enjoys cleaning containment chambers and toilets, although these claims can be disputed with his higher-ups. Sapient anomalous objects claim that Pie is excellent at his job and that their cells are sparkling by the time he is done with them. These reports are similar for the breakrooms and offices located within his workspace. Following Incident Pie-58, Pie has proven useful for testing whether bulbs installed in further expansions to Site-81 are bright enough. Other than this, Pie serves little to no use at all whatsoever. Unless otherwise impossible, it is recommended that those who come into contact with Pie wash their hands and take a shower as soon as possible. Pie may carry several contagious diseases such as malaria, norovirus, influenza, meningitis, pertussis, [[[SCP-610]]], and the common cold. For more information, indulge yourself in [[[SCP-1025]]]. **Anomalous items cleaned by Pie:** **[[[SCP-2704]]]** - 🕷️ Beetle Royale 🕷️ [[span style="color:gray"]]//...all humans within the limits of the town demanifest instantaneously and are replaced with a supella longipalpa.//[[/span]] **[[[SCP-4460]]]** - Humorous Factory [[span style="color:gray"]]//"What do you call a pig with no ears? [DATA REDACTED]!"//[[/span]] **[[[SCP-4944]]]** - A Coffee Machine, Except It's Literally Just a Cargo Ship,,<- only read this one,, [[span style="color:gray"]]//"Why do you bear the appearance of a coffee machine?" - "Practicing impression."//[[/span]] ------ **Incident Pie-58:** On 9/8/2021, Pie came into contact with SCP-[[span class="bblock"]]numbers[[/span]] whilst cleaning its cell, which caused the physical body of Pie to transfigure into that of a //Idaea dilutaria//. Pie still holds the sentience and sapience that of a normal //homo sapien//, and is also able to speak, think, and see the same as one as well. If provoked, however, Pie will enter a "rage state", and will flutter furiously in the assailant's face. While this does nothing to injure the assailant, subjects claim that it "tickles". [[/div]]