Agent, Father, Motherfucker: Alto Clef, in memoriam

Link to article: Agent, Father, Motherfucker: Alto Clef, in memoriam.

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blockquote
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=====
[[include component:preview
text=On August 12th, 2017 at 7am, Agent Alto Clef was killed in a fatal car wreck, which, most people would agree, was quite a lovely thing.
]]
=====
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[[>]]
[[module rate]]
[[/>]]
[[div class="rainbownot"]]
[[/div]]

[[size 24px]]**One of our own has passed.**[[/size]]
[[size 12px]]Posted by Dr. Simon Glass[[/size]]

It has come to our attention that Dr. Alto Clef was involved in a car accident this weekend on his way home from a mission in London, Ohio. At this time, staff is still confirming the course of events that lead to this outcome.

[[size 22px]]**Discussion (1) ¬**[[/size]]


[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Simon Glass**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 4:52 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
The Department of Psychology is available for employees in need of counseling during this time.

~ Dr. Glass
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

@@ @@

@@ @@

@@ @@

@@ @@

[[div class="rainbowshit"]]
[[/div]]

[[size 24px]]**CLEF IS FUCKING DEAD**[[/size]]
[[size 12px]]Posted by Dr. Yaoi[[/size]]

[[=image http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/local--files/ripclef/blurryclef.jpg style="width:70%;box-shadow: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.1) 0px 1px 1px 0px inset, rgba(50, 50, 93, 0.25) 0px 50px 100px -20px, rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.3) 0px 30px 60px -30px;"]]
= March 20, 1963 - August 12, 2017

[[div style="padding:10px;margin-top:-30px;"]]
I just heard that Clef died in a car crash this weekend. I couldn't find much information on the circumstances but I thought it would be appropriate to pay our respects to one of our own.
[[/div]]

[[size 22px]]**Discussion (338) ¬**[[/size]]


[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Jay Everwood**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 7:12 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Did you know that world-renowned agent Alto Clef once died in a car crash? Just something to consider.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Ricardo Atter**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 7:16 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
No he ain't, he owes me 5$
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Mann**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 7:22 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
It appears he failed to clear his debt with me before he had to leave this mortal coil.
Alas, may it serve him well as he meets the ferryman.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Adams**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 7:25 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
He still hasn't repaid me from last weeks poker. Asshole, I knew he wasn't good for it
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning three"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Juke**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 7:35 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Interesting way to get out of child support.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning four chainmore"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Researcher Halloway**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 8:16 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
How many of us has he stiffed?
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr Jeremiah Cimmerian**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 8:19 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
A reminder that nicknames such as "Alternative Credit", "Broke Bastard" and "Gambling Debt over 9000" are offensive toward the deceased, however accurate that number might appear to be.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Testy**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 7:52 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
I just want to express how annoyed I am at all of this. This event is not necessary. You've interrupted the season finale of Criminal Minds. Clef's death was neither near nor relevant to me, and you've ruined my evening.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Thaddeus Xyank**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 7:11 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
AGAIN?!
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Dmitri Arkadeyevich Strelnikov**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 9:03 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
To be or not be, that is question here too. Weather is noble in mind to suffer strings and arrows of [# expand]
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Dmitri Arkadeyevich Strelnikov**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 9:16 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Rosy by other name also smells. Of course, Alto no rose -- except prickly. And with [# expand]
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Dmitri Arkadeyevich Strelnikov**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 10:56 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Rose wilt, and wilt thou be gone? Ah, there is a rub. For what it is comes [# expand]
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning three chainlast"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Dmitri Arkadeyevich Strelnikov**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 11:01 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
The fair Alto? Bastard in his naming. Be all his sins remember.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Rev R. Rent**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 8:23 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
RIP Clef. Gone, but not forgotten, and not missed either.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Researcher Neil Ghost**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 8:36 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
RIP. Its frankly amazing he lasted this long.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Job**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 8:42 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
I thought he died 10 months ago?
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning three"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Anonymous**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 8:42 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
i heard he died of ligma
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Flo**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 8:53 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
I don't know about the rest of you, but I took out a $100,000 insurance policy on his ukulele so I'm feeling pretty good right now.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Hana Thompson**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 8:54 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
The King of RBF is dead. I look forward to eating my lunch without someone mean mugging me from across the cafeteria. Jerk.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Gears**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 10:15 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
very sadp ost imso sorry for family lol 😂
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr Faget**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 10:41 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Who the hell is this clown?
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Chelsea Elliot**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 10:53 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
You know, I've been hearing that name all morning, and I refuse to learn who this Clef is.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Anonymous**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 10:53 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
not a lot of people know this, but he actually preferred el clefe
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agatha Rights**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 03:00 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
[[=image http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/local--files/ripclef/clevil.jpg style="width:50%;"]]
//See you in hell, space cowboy.//
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Goldbaker-Reinz Ltd.**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 3:01 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
We have performed a review of your policy per clause SCP-6987-E16 and determined that Agent Alto Clef does //not// meet our definition of essential or specialized personnel. We would also like to remind the Foundation that per clause SCP-6987-E17 all personnel deaths must occur either on an official Foundation site or during an official Foundation sanctioned mission. As such, we can reward no payment at this time.

Thank you for your attention.

-Goldbaker-Reinz Ltd.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr Trebuchet**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 6:21 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
The poll gave some surprising results. I had you pegged for an 8th Circler for sure.
[[collapsible show="Click to see attachment (1)" hide="Hide attachment"]]
[[image http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/local--files/ripclef/Hellpoll.jpg]]
[[/collapsible]]
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dir. Sophia Light**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 8:16 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
I'd like to remind all personnel that the death of Dr. Clef is not an opportunity to acquire his office supplies.  

My condolences to his family.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. R. Ton**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 8:18 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Saw a lovely piece of cheese in his desk drawer

**EDIT:** DO NOT OPEN THERE WAS A TRAP!!!
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Fling**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 8:20 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
His Pencil Sharpener Has Seen Things
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Ida Karjala**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 12, 2017, 8:25 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
i tried to identify where that general stench of decay was coming from in there but had no luck. i think it's in the walls.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Prof. Dr. Luca Armaros**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 9:22 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Alto and I never truly saw eye to eye -- both physically and mentally. Spending time with him was a true challenge of human nature, and an opportunity for personal growth. He taught me patience, self-restraint, and showed me enormous depths of self-control I had not been aware I was capable of. He was a shining example, one that showed us the importance of cologne and regular showers, as well as the joy in wearing whatever you feel comfortable in. At the end of the day, the world is a different place without him, and I can't say my life will be the same. He truly has left an impression on all of us.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Draven Rodríguez-Kondraki**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 10:10 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
They should've never given back your license.
In Memoriam of Clef
Something deep

zchzzzzzzzzzzzzzz2222111111.. 2222111
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Heather Garrison**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 10:16 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Seriously? I can't fucking believe you idiots, the Foundation would never *actually* allow a secret hidden Site where the anomalies run things, and the 'Foundation' is the real anomaly.

You really think that?
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Heather Garrison**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 11:57 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
It appears I was replying to the wrong post. My bad.

It doesn't make me less right, though.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Intern Casey**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 8:13 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Hooray! No more time in the ukulele room!
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Sharpe**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 8:37 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Guess he really got himself in treble this time, eh?
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Prof. Dr. Kain Crow**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 9:33 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
The water dispenser in the East Wing is malfunctioning.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Rikki Rodríguez**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 9:36 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Kain dear, this is a memorial thread for Alto.

You should go to s/maintenaince for repair requests.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Prof. Dr. Kain Crow**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 9:41 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Oh gosh golly, how awful of me. My deepest apologies and sincerest condolences.

Dreadful business. Absolutely dreadful.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Prof. Dr. Kain Crow**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 9:41 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
s/maintenaince
The water dispenser in the East Wing is malfunctioning.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Researcher Rex**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 10:01 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
This is so sad, Alexa play Despacito!
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Lament**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 10:41 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Can't believe he died in a car crash. What a way to go.

Rest in peace, old man.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Nottellingyou**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 10:43 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
thats becaus thats what they want you to think
its code
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Anonymous**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 10:43 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
i heard its code for ligma
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Ethan Aldrich**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 10:56 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Of all the prepared Death Certificates we had for him, can't believe the car crash stuck
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Carissa Decimus**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 10:58 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Alright fess up. Which one of you assholes did this before I could? There's no way this motherfucker went down in a traffic accident. Now I'm out six months worth of art supplies.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Professor M.**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 11:07 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
For once, not it.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dir. Vincent Bohart**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 11:03 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Bet he was texting and driving.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two chainmore"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Job**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 11:08 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
wouldnt be surprised if he was, you know..
::420::
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two chainlast"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr Jeremiah Cimmerian**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 7:03 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
A reminder that speculating on the substance use or abuse of another colleague is inappropriate behaviour. Likewise, nicknames such as "Altoid Clef" and "Type Green Expert" are inappropriate, however accurate they may be.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]


[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Jonathan A. King**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 02:07 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Clef? Of all people? Are you sure that it wasn’t Gerald in a Hawaiian shirt? Are you **SURE** you’re sure?
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Rodney Gerald**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 02:44 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
I swear it wasn’t me! I’ve heard people talking all morning, and I don’t even know what Clef’s car looks like!
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning three"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Anonymous**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 02:44 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
i confess, it was mee
i cut his brakes drank the fluid
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning four"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Diogenes - HR**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 02:53 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
HR would like to remind all personnel that jokes about having committed acts of homicide against fellow employees will be treated as confessions and investigated as such.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning five cainlast"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Diogenes - HR**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 02:54 pm| [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Also, SCiPPit isn't really anonymous. Try to at least be original, Wyatt.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Technician Mopper**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 03:23 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
We at the UFJS would like to extend our sincere condolences for the loss of Dr. Alto Clef.

The UFJS would also like to extend its sincere gratitude to the driver of the other car. We would all like to buy you a drink.

- Union of Foundation Janitorial Staff
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Tilda Moose**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 05:36 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
This may be the work of a Nälkän sect.

There's powerful carnomancy at play.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr Rupert Chomsky**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 06:14 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
Bah! The blasted bastard's kicked the bucket and is well out of Wellington. Oh well, never grokked his gab anyway!
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Diogenes - HR**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 13, 2017, 07:19 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
My thoughts are with his family. He is surely hard to replace.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Yaoi**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 14, 2017, 02:54 am | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
I made the thread gay. It's what he would've wanted.
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning zero"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Draws**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 14, 2017, 03:01 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
@@ @@
👍
@@ @@
[[collapsible show="Click to see attachment (1)" hide="Hide attachment"]]
[[image http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/local--files/ripclef/clefdeadpose.png]]
[[/collapsible]]
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning one"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Fling**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 14, 2017, 07:06 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
👍
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning two"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr Faget**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 14, 2017, 07:06 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
👍
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning three"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr. Heather Garrison**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 14, 2017, 07:07 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
👍
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning four"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Dr Mann**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 14, 2017, 07:08 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
👍
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="turning five"]]
[[span class="namer"]]**Agent Draven Rodríguez-Kondraki**[[/span]]
[[span class="nomer"]]Aug 14, 2017, 07:08 pm | [# Reply][[/span]]
[[div class="wheel"]]
👍
[[/div]]
[[/div]]

@@ @@
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[[div class="blockquote"]]
= **Audio Transcript**
-----
**DATE:** 15 AUG 2017

**NOTE:** Recording of phone call to Dir. Light's office

**ATTENDING:**
Director Sophia Light
Agent Alto Clef

-----
[BEGIN LOG]

**LIGHT:** Who is this?

**CLEF:** SOPH! Finally.

**LIGHT:** Alto?

**CLEF:** Been walking for bloody miles. Signal's absolute shite out here.

**LIGHT:** Are you --

**CLEF:** I tried Konny but he's not answering, unsurprisingly. Then I tried Adams, but Strel answered and just started wailing about Hamlet's father. What the hell's gotten into y'all?

**LIGHT:** You're alive?

**CLEF:** ... yes?

**LIGHT:** We found your car several days ago, covered in bloody remains. We searched the area and --

**CLEF:** Yeah I ran into a boar. Or a bear. I don't fucking know. Fucking Ohio.

**LIGHT:** Some people assumed --

**CLEF:** Assumed what?

//[A pause]//

**CLEF:** Assumed //what//, Sophia?

**LIGHT:** Well, I'm sure they will be relieved to hear the good news. I'll arrange a pickup.

//[Several pings are heard through the line.]//

**CLEF:** Wait I think I just got internet again.

//[Several seconds of silence.]//

**CLEF:** For Christ sake.

**CLEF:** //Christ//.

**CLEF:** You didn't tell my daughter, did you?

**CLEF:** SOPHIA!

[Phone call ends]

[END LOG]
[[/div]]

@@ @@
@@ @@

[[include :scp-wiki:component:license-box
|author=AstersQuill, FlyPurgatorio, sailorenoch, OriTiefling, Dino--Draws, Rosyfox2002, Prismal, fairydoctor, DrBleep, Uncle Nicolini, DoctorLilithSophia, Queerious, Guaire, Fish^12, JukeShoes, SynthPanda_, Waxx, DrRevan & Anky swallow]]

> **Quote:** "To be, or not to be, that is the question: Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,"
> **Name Source:** The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark
> **Author:** William Shakespeare
> **License:** Public Domain
> **Source Link:** [https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Author:William_Shakespeare_(1564-1616) Example link]
> **Additional Notes:** Paraphrased

> **Quote:** "That which we call a rose By any other name would smell as sweet"
> **Name Source:** Romeo and Juliet
> **Author:** William Shakespeare
> **License:** Public Domain
> **Source Link:** [https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Author:William_Shakespeare_(1564-1616) Example link]
> **Additional Notes:** Paraphrased

> **Quote:** "The fair Ophelia? Nymph, in thy Orisons Be all my sins remember'd."
> **Name Source:** The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark
> **Author:** William Shakespeare
> **License:** Public Domain
> **Source Link:** [https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Author:William_Shakespeare_(1564-1616) Example link]
> **Additional Notes:** Paraphrased

> **Filename:** BlurryClef.jpg
> **Author:** [[*user Rosyfox2002]]
> **License:** CC BY-SA 3.0
> **Source Link:** [http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/local--files/ripclef/blurryclef.jpg LINK]
> **Source:** Authors own work

> **Filename:** Clevil.jpg
> **Author:** [[*user sailorenoch]]
> **License:** CC BY-SA 3.0
> **Source Link:** [http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/local--files/ripclef/clevil.jpg LINK]
> **Source:** Authors own work

> **Filename:** Hellpoll
> **Author:** [[*user sailorenoch]] & [[*user Fish^12]]
> **License:** CC BY-SA 3.0
> **Source Link:** [http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/local--files/ripclef/Hellpoll.jpg LINK]
> **Source:** Authors own work

> **Filename:** Clefdeadpose.png
> **Author:** [[*user Dino--Draws]]
> **License:** CC BY-SA 3.0
> **Source Link:** [http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/local--files/ripclef/clefdeadpose.png LINK]
> **Source:** Authors own work

[[include :scp-wiki:component:license-box-end]]

Agent, Father, Motherfucker: Alto Clef, in memoriam

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