SCP-2772-J

Link to article: SCP-2772-J.

Module Styles

• #header h1 a {
      display: block;
      margin: 0;
      padding: 80px 0 25px;
      line-height: 0px;
      max-height: 0px;
      color: transparent;
      background: transparent;
      font-family: Sans-Normalcy. 'Nanum Gothic'. Arial. sans-serif;
      text-decoration: none;
      text-shadow: none;
      letter-spacing: 1px;
  }
   
  #header h1 a::before {
      content: "SCP Foundation";
      color: #eee;
      letter-spacing: 0.02em;
      text-shadow: 3px 3px 5px #000;
  }
   
  #header h2 span {
      display: block;
      margin: 0;
      padding: 19px 0;
      line-height: 0px;
      max-height: 0px;
      font-weight: bold;
      color: transparent;
      text-shadow: none;
  }
   
  #header h2 span::before {
      content: "Selling Cars Poorly";
      color: #f0f0c0;
      text-shadow: 1px 1px 1px #000;
      text-shadow: 1px 1px 1px rgba(0,0,0,.8);
  }
  
  sup {
    vertical-align: top;
    position: relative;
    top: -0.5em;
  }
  
  .scp-image-block.block-right { margin: 1em 2em 1em 1em; }
  

Inline Styles

• (none)

Includes

• (none)

CSS Classes

• (none)

Page Source

[[module CSS]]
#header h1 a {
    display: block;
    margin: 0;
    padding: 80px 0 25px;
    line-height: 0px;
    max-height: 0px;
    color: transparent;
    background: transparent;
    font-family: Sans-Normalcy. 'Nanum Gothic'. Arial. sans-serif;
    text-decoration: none;
    text-shadow: none;
    letter-spacing: 1px;
}
 
#header h1 a::before {
    content: "SCP Foundation";
    color: #eee;
    letter-spacing: 0.02em;
    text-shadow: 3px 3px 5px #000;
}
 
#header h2 span {
    display: block;
    margin: 0;
    padding: 19px 0;
    line-height: 0px;
    max-height: 0px;
    font-weight: bold;
    color: transparent;
    text-shadow: none;
}
 
#header h2 span::before {
    content: "Selling Cars Poorly";
    color: #f0f0c0;
    text-shadow: 1px 1px 1px #000;
    text-shadow: 1px 1px 1px rgba(0,0,0,.8);
}

sup {
  vertical-align: top;
  position: relative;
  top: -0.5em;
}

.scp-image-block.block-right { margin: 1em 2em 1em 1em; }

[[/module]]

[[>]]
[[module Rate]]
[[/>]]

[[include component:image-block
    name=IMG_2772NOPLATE.jpg|
    caption=SCP-2772-J on full display. You won't find a better deal anywhere else!]]

**Item #:** SCP-2772-J

**Object Class:** For Sale

**Special Containment Procedures:** SCP-2772-J is currently in the possession of Dr. Gary Gleason, and is to be sold to a prospective buyer as soon as possible.

**Description:** SCP-2772-J is a lightly used 2006 Ford Expedition with an Eddie Bauer trim package. It has been owned and operated by Dr. Gleason for about 8 years. It is of immeasurable importance to sell SCP-2772-J to another person in a short amount of time. Notable details of SCP-2772-J include:

* 7 cushy seats
* A combined MPG rating of 17
* A great sound system
* Up-to-date registration and insurance
* Only 97,223 miles!!!

SCP-2772-J is available to purchase for --$2500-- --$2000-- $1900 US dollars. Call Dr. Gleason at (███)-867-5309 for more details.

**Interviews:** The following is an incomplete log of people who refused the chance to buy SCP-2772-J from Dr. Gleason at a reasonable price.

[[collapsible show="+ SCP-2772-J sales pitches" hide="- These guys missed out on a great deal!"]]

> **Interview 2772-J-01**
> 
> **Honest Salesman:** Dr. Gleason
> 
> **Stingy Bastard:** Agent Caesar Spago
> 
> **Foreword:** Agent Spago has just arrived at Site-56 after the conclusion of an unrelated [[[SCP-4618|interview]]].
> 
> --------
> 
> **<Begin Log>**
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** Hey, Caesar, you're back! 
> 
> **Agent Spago:** Hi, Gary. It took me seven hours to walk all the way back here from Brighton High, all because Donahue didn't have the sense to pick me up afterwards. 
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** Man, it looks like you needed some reliable transportation! Wait till you see this!
> 
> **Agent Spago:** That's nice, but I just want a coffee and some vacation pay right n-
> 
> //Dr. Gleason drags Agent Spago to the Site-56 parking lot without Agent Spago's consent, and stops in front of SCP-2772-J.//
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** Look at this bad boy! It's got air conditioning, and exclusive trim-
> 
> **Agent Spago:** Gary, I don't want to buy your SUV. I already have a car.
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** But with //this//, you could've driven back instead of walking!
> 
> **Agent Spago:** //<very very angry>// Well, it's too late now! 
> 
> //Agent Spago starts to walk away.//
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** Caesar, wait! I still haven't told you about the seat warmers!
> 
> **<End Log>**
> 
> ----------
> 
> **Closing Statement:** Following Agent Spago's refusal to purchase SCP-2772-J, Dr. Gleason was recorded making a sales pitch to Researcher Murrieta, who also refused.

> **Interview 2772-J-02**
> 
> **Opportunity Provider:** Dr. Gleason
> 
> **Annoying Cheapskate:** Dr. Victoria Vomac
> 
> **Foreword:** Dr. Vomac is currently in the market for a new vehicle.
> 
> -------
> 
> **<Begin Log>**
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** //<meekly>// Vicky, could I speak with you for a second?
> 
> **Dr. Vomac:** Yeah, sure, what do ya need?
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** I heard you're looking for a car to buy, so I thought that-
> 
> **Dr. Vomac:** Oh [[[http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-343|343]]], not this again.
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** Yes, this again! My SUV is perfect for your family, and it holds more cargo than that minivan you're wanting to buy.
> 
> **Dr. Vomac:** Gleason, we've already been over this. I'm not buying your car.
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** So what?! You're just gonna sink 30 grand in a mommy-mobile, when you can get my Eddie Bauer for a tenth of that?
> 
> **Dr. Vomac:** Get out of my office.
> 
> **<End Log>**
> 
> -------
> 
> **Closing Statement:** Dr. Vomac's refusal to get a great deal must be the result of some sort of infohazard. I will have to look into this. -Dr. Gleason

> **Interview 2772-J-03**
> 
> **Deal-Making Doctor:** Dr. Gleason
> 
> **Greedy Miser:** Researcher Taylor Tassajara
> 
> **Foreword:** Researcher Tassajara is the only one at Site-56 that Dr. Gleason has not asked at this point.
> 
> -------
> 
> **<Begin Log>**
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** Excuse me? Are you Tassajara?
> 
> **Researcher Tassajara:** Oh, yes. You must be Gleason. Nice to meet you.
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** Look, I... I have something I've never told anyone before.
> 
> **Researcher Tassajara:** Is this about the Ford you're trying to sell?
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** No, it's- actually, yeah, it's about that. How did you know?
> 
> **Researcher Tassajara:** Everyone warned me about this. And just to get this out of the way, I'm not buying SCP-2772-J.
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** Ah, you've seen my database entry. So will you buy it?
> 
> **Researcher Tassajara:** //<in an annoyed tone>// I just said no! Get away from me!!
> 
> //Researcher Tassajara runs down the hall, away from Dr. Gleason.//
> 
> **<End Log>**
> 
> --------
> 
> **Closing Statement:** Shoot. Looks like the infohazard spread to her, too. -Dr. Gleason

[[/collapsible]]

//Director's Note: Dr. Gleason, the creation of an SCP entry just to sell your SUV is unacceptable. See me in my office.//

[[collapsible show="+ Director's Meeting Transcript Regarding SCP-2772-J" hide="- I just wanna sell this before the smog check comes up."]]

> **Interview 2772-J-04**
> 
> **Innocent Entrepreneur:** Dr. Gleason
> 
> **Pretentious Penny-Pincher:** Director Peter Palermo
> 
> **Foreword:** This is a scheduled meeting regarding SCP-2772-J.
> ------
> **<Begin Log>**
> 
> **Director Palermo:** Gary Gleason, sit down.
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** Hello, Mr. Palermo. I'll take cash or credit for my SUV. I have the papers ready.
> 
> **Director Palermo:** //<confused>// Wha... what? No, we need to talk about "2772-J". And it's //Director// Palermo to you.
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** Oh yes, my SUV. If you want, I'm willing to cut a hundred dollars off the price.
> 
> **Director Palermo:** This is ridiculous! You cannot write an SCP entry just to advertise your damn car! You need to delete it, or I'm gonna get you terminated.
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** Oh, I see. You're affected by the infohazard, too.
> 
> **Director Palermo:** //<confused out of his mind>// Wha... what??
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** There's a infohazard going around causing people to react with hostility towards SCP-2772-J. Don't worry, I'm trying to find a cure.
> 
> **Director Palermo:** No, no! This isn't a infohazard, it's just that no one wants your car!!
> 
> **Dr. Gleason:** It's okay, Director Palermo. Your viewpoint isn't natural, you're just a victim of a infoha-
> 
> **Director Palermo:** //<really upset>// GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!!
> 
> **<End Log>**
> 
> ------
> 
> **Closing Statement:** The Director does not seem to be immune to the infohazard. I should investigate whether it affects civilians. -Dr. Gleason

[[/collapsible]]

//Director's Note: It seems that the only way to get rid of Dr. Gleason's pleas is to just buy "SCP-2772-J" from him. So, who's gonna take one for the team? It's only 1900 bucks now.//