SCP-7538

Link to article: SCP-7538.

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    --header-subtitle: "Anomalous Entity Engagement Division";
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[[include :scp-wiki:theme:black-highlighter-theme]]
[[include :scp-wiki:theme:shark-punching-centre-bhl]]
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    --header-subtitle: "Anomalous Entity Engagement Division";
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[[include :scp-wiki:component:classified-bar-woed
|lv=2
|item=7538
|oc= Safe
|lang=EN
]]
----
[[table style="width: 100%;"]]
[[row]]
[[cell style="border-bottom: 1px solid #AAA; border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 90%]]**Assigned Site**[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="border-bottom: 1px solid #AAA; border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 90%]]**Site Director**[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="border-bottom: 1px solid #AAA; border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 90%]]**Research Head**[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="border-bottom: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 90%]]**Assigned Task Force**[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[/row]]
[[row]]
[[cell style="border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 80%]]Aquatic Site-757[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 80%]]Terry Numen[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="border-right: 1px solid #AAA; text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 80%]]Meg Mako[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[cell style="text-align: center; width: 25%;"]]
[[size 80%]]N/A[[/size]]
[[/cell]]
[[/row]]
[[/table]]
----
[[include component:image-block name=https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/local--files/scp-7538/Sharkie.jpg|caption=SCP-7538 instance|width=250px]]

**Special Containment Procedures:** Instances of SCP-7538 are confined within a standard containment unit under the purview of the [https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/anomalous-entity-engagement-division-hub Anomalous Entity Engagement Division (AEED).] Assigned personnel are allowed to interact with said specimens on a bi-weekly basis in various recreational activities. Those outside the SCP-7538 management team may also participate with permission from the Research Head.

**Description:** SCP-7538 designates a group of sentient stuffed selachians colloquially referred to as 'Blåhaj', manufactured by the Swedish company IKEA.

Specimens of SCP-7538 are capable of levitation, travelling through the air in a matter comparable to swimming in the ocean. Despite bearing a resemblance to typical blue sharks, SCP-7538's behavior are similar to that of domesticated canines, being fairly docile and able to understand simple instructions.

----

**Addendum:** Recording Log

On the 9^^th^^ of November, 2021, an unauthorized package was delivered to Site-757 before being taken in by Dr. Mako and brought to SCP-7538's  cell. Due to this, Senior Researcher Anthony Clips was sent in to investigate the matter.

[[div class="blockquote"]]
**[BEGIN LOG]**

//Clips enters the containment chamber while fixated on a clipboard he has in hand.//

**Clips:** Good afternoon, Ms. Mako. Director Numen had sent me here to inspect a certain matter involving a recent package that arrived on-site. Apparently, I was told you would know about it so —

//He looks up and sees Mako, who is staring back at him while taping a boxing glove to the tip of an SCP-7538 instance's nose with duct tape. Her mouth is agape and her eyes are widened as Clips accidentally drops his clipboard. There is a brief moment of silence.//

//A number of other specimens are also equipped with boxing gloves. He kneels down and picks up his clipboard.//

**Clips:** What are you doing?

//Mako glances away from Clips before looking back.//

**Mako:** What does it look like I'm doing?

**Clips:** It looks like you're attaching boxing gloves to your pet sharks.

**Mako:** Well, you'd be right, my good man. Thanks for the observation!

//Clips clicks his pen repeatedly and sighs.//

**Clips:** I'm reporting you to the higher ups.

**Mako:** Wait, wait, wait —

//Mako scrambles to Clips, almost tripping while doing so.//

**Mako:** I can assure you that I have a very reasonable explanation behind… //(gestures)// all this. It makes a lot of sense once you hear me out.

**Clips:** I'm sorry but I doubt there's anything reasonable about //that.//

//Clips points to two SCP-7538 instances bumping into each other using the boxing gloves. She turns to them and lets out a chuckle.//

**Mako:** It's cute, isn't it?

**Clips:** That's… besides the point.

**Mako:** Eh, you were considering it for a moment.

**Clips:** No, I wasn't.

**Mako:** Are you //shore?// Laying playful punches on your new fishy friends. You'd be down for that, right?

**Clips:** No, I wouldn't. That's ridiculous.

//Mako turns back.//

**Mako:** Look, Clippy —

**Clips:** Don't call me "Clippy".

**Mako:** — //Clips,// right. This is all just a misunderstanding. I mean, I’m only trying to expand on our recreational activities. Creating more games we can play together, you know?

**Clips:** And you jumped to… //boxing gloves?//

**Mako:** This is just an experiment!

**Clips:** This is a glorified show-and-tell at an elementary school.

**Mako:** Good g//reef//, Clips. You're hurting the poor souls. Look at them.

//Two SCP-7538 instances are chasing one another. Clips raises his eyebrow.//

**Clips:** You're hurting the site's budget.

**Mako:** No, I'm not. This is from my own paycheck, honest.

**Clips:** Then you're hurting your own budget. I'm leaving.

//Mako rushes to the entrance, blocking him.//

**Mako:** I'm afraid I can't let you go, Clips.

**Clips:** Step away, Ms. Mako. You're being highly unprofessional.

**Mako:** No. I'm sorry, but you leave me no choice. //(Raises her voice)// Finions!

//All SCP-7538 specimens faces Mako and Clips.//

**Clips:** What the f —

**Mako:** //ATTACK!//

//Mako shoves Clips to the ground as the SCP-7538 instances approach him, proceeding to surround and punch him all over his body again and again.//

**Mako:** That's right. Come on, boys. Punch him in the gut!

**Clips:** Hey, stop! Get off of me!

**Mako:** What's wrong, Clips? Don't you //sea// how much fun they're having?

**Clips:** Mako, for the love of — //ow!//

//Clips shields himself from the specimens with his clipboard.//

**Mako:** I'm sure it can also improve staff morale. Very entertaining, very fun. It's a jawsome idea, don't you agree?

**Clips:** //Ow!// — As if.

**Mako:** Aw, you're such a gilljoy.

**Clips:** Mako, can you please stop this whole fiasc — //ow!// — STOP THAT!

//The SCP-7538 instances stop and hesitate for a moment before continuing.//

**Mako:** No, I still need more data. Just keep 'em occupied for a little longer, okay?

**Clips:** Ugh…

//The next few minutes consist of Clips being constantly hit by the SCP-7538 instances, occasionally but unsuccessfully attempting to wave them off with his arm. Mako then calls them off, causing the specimens to fly elsewhere and interact with each other again.//

//Clips remains in a fetal position as Mako kneels down, staring at his face. He ignores her and turns to the ground.//

**Mako:** So, //water// your thoughts? What'd you think?

//Pause.//

**Clips:** …I think I hate you.

//Another pause. Mako grins.//

**Mako:** //(Inhales)// Worth it.

**[FIN. LOG]**
[[/div]]

Dr. Mako was later reprimanded for this behavior. The boxing gloves were also confiscated and removed from facility grounds.
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[[span class="text"]]cmon clips[[/span]]
[[span class="text"]]i said i was sorry[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="recv"]]
[[span class="text"]]No, Mako. You should consider this a warning for such childish conduct. Even if your department handles matters concerning the morale of anomalies, I did not consent to being endlessly punched by shark toys stuck with boxing gloves.[[/span]]
[[span class="text"]]Apology unaccepted.[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="sent"]]
[[span class="text"]]okay, yeah, that was unfair. i shouldve given u the chance to fight back[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="recv"]]
[[span class="text"]]What?[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="sent"]]
[[span class="text"]]what did u do with the gloves anyway?[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="recv"]]
[[span class="text"]]Like we said, they were disposed of.[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="sent"]]
[[span class="text"]]no dont lie[[/span]]
[[span class="text"]]i saw that glimmer in ur eyes back there[[/span]]
[[span class="text"]]theres no need to be so uptide, u know[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="recv"]]
[[span class="text"]]I'm not lying.[[/span]]
[[span class="text"]]Stop with the puns.[[/span]]
[[span class="text"]]And stop acting like you know what you're saying.[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="sent"]]
[[span class="text"]]look, me and the other management staff r planning to have an all out fight with our sharks. twice as many boxing gloves, twice as many punches, twice as fun[[/span]]
[[span class="text"]]i know u said we shouldnt slack off like that but theres nothing wrong with loosening up every once in a while[[/span]]
[[span class="text"]]besides, we can just write it off as standard protocol. im sure its fine[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="recv"]]
[[span class="text"]]Please, I have no reason to play around with you lot.[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="sent"]]
[[span class="text"]]clips, its a simple yes or no question[[/span]]
[[span class="text"]]u wanna come with or not?[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="recv"]]
[[span class="text"]]…[[/span]]
[[span class="text"]]Okay, fine.[[/span]]
[[span class="text"]]The gloves are in my closet.[[/span]]
[[/div]]

[[div class="sent"]]
[[span class="text"]]cool, sea u next week[[/span]]
[[/div]]
[[/div]]
[[/div]]
~~~~
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[[include component:wikimodule |ratings= --]]]

[[=]]
[[div class="footer-wikiwalk-nav"]]
<< [[[SCP-7537]]] | SCP-7538 | [[[SCP-7539]]] >>
[[/div]]

[[include :scp-wiki:component:license-box
|author=winkwonkboi]]
=====
> **Filename:** Sharkie
> **Name:** IKEA shark friend
> **Author:** brownpau 
> **License:** CC BY 2.0
> **Source Link:** [https://www.flickr.com/photos/44124483743@N01/45138283654 Flickr]
=====
[[include :scp-wiki:component:license-box-end]]
[[/=]]

SCP-7538

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