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Link to article: REDACTED DUE TO LACK OF NUMBER.


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[[image https://testinggrounds.wdfiles.com/local--files/taboo-j/TabooJWarning.png]]

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[[include :scp-wiki:component:image-block name=https://testinggrounds.wdfiles.com/local--files/taboo-j/stump.png
|align=center|width=100%|caption={{Fig 1.1.}} Nothing to see here.]]

----

**ITEM #:** //Undesignated per protocol [[span style="filter: blur(8px);"]]████[[/span]]-Eshu.//[[span class="fnnum"]].[[/span]][[span class="fncon"]] While **##dda0dd|the decaying tree remains which have been given a severe nomenclative hazard that makes it so we can't give them the same designation twice##** were originally going to recieve the SCP-4000 slot, the anomalous event known as "[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/taboo/offset/3 Furcon 2018]" took precedence. [[/span]]

**OBJECT CLASS:** Keter

**SPECIAL CONTAINMENT PROCEDURES:** As knowledge of **##dda0dd|the thing that is being actively described within the file you are currently reading with your own two eyes right now##** is commonplace among members of the Foundation due to gossip regarding its existence, efforts are to be taken to restrict further discussion of **##dda0dd|this anomaly that is right there in the image you can see above you on the file##**.

Personnel are to be informed **##dda0dd|the place that the Administrator totally doesn't put his stash of naughty magazines##** is not filled with pornographic magazines stored there by the Administrator and that he did not intentionally create the nomenclative hazard currently affecting **##dda0dd|the tree stump that has a big hole in it with a lever to access a secret compartment which was definitely not created by the Administrator and was already there when he found it##** to obscure his activities from the greater Foundation.

**DESCRIPTION:** **##dda0dd|The Joke SCP that you have had the displeasure of clicking on and reading up to the point which you are at right now##** is a large tree stump located on a Foundation-owned field nearby Overwatch Command Site-01.

**##dda0dd|The anomaly that, as you can see, is mostly surrounded by grass, but does have some bare dirt right at its base and some small sticks nearby if you look##** possesses a severe nomenclative hazard which results in disastrous effects occuring if the same designation is given to it twice. While containment of this hazard would normally be feasible, extensive gossip regarding **##dda0dd|this annoying fucking tree stump that I have to think of a new name for every time I talk about or else I get fired and don't get my monthly bonus##** has resulted in personnel using up a significant number of designations, requiring increasingly complex names being given to **##dda0dd|the SCP that is incredibly annoying to write about because every time I draft a file related to it I'm at the office for three hours of unpaid overtime just because of all the new names I have to give the little bastard##**.

**ADDENDUM:** Recorded Logs

[[div class="blockquote"]]

= **<<Begin Log>>**

//Agent Fritz Williams and Dr. Eric Murdoch are leaning against a wall outside of a containment chamber.//

**Dr. Murdoch:** You know Fritz, it's funny. We've been friends for so long, yet I've never seen your face underneath that combat helmet.

**Agent Williams:** I know, such a shame I have to keep it on or I get fired.

**Dr. Murdoch:** Right? Ugh... actually, that made me think of something. You know what else I haven't seen? **##dda0dd|The treestump that we have to keep using increasingly complicated names for where the Administrator is apparently keeping his porn stash##**. What's up with that whole deal, am I right?

**Agent Williams:** I knew it!

**Dr. Murdoch:** Wha--

//Agent Williams takes off his helmet, revealing himself to be the Administrator.//

**Administrator:** I knew you were one of the bastards gossiping about it!

//The Administrator pulls out a small pistol from his pocket before shooting the doctor three times.//

= **<<End Log>>**

[[/div]]

[[div class="blockquote"]]

= **<<Begin Log>>**

//Drs. Elaine Matthews and Samuel Foster are walking down a hallway within Site-01.//

**Dr. Foster:** You know, do you ever wonder why we can't call **##dda0dd|that treestump##** the same thing twice?

**Dr. Matthews:** The what?

**Dr. Foster:** **##dda0dd|That treestump##**, the one where the Administrator keeps hi--

//Dr. Foster is suddenly shot, causing him to immediately expire. Dr. Matthews catches a member of MTF Alpha-1 ("Red Right Hand") fleeing down the hallway.//

**Dr. Matthews:** I guess that's why.

= **<<End Log>>**

[[/div]]

[[div class="blockquote"]]

= **<<Begin Log>>**

//Agents Ryan Lang and Ruth Williams are sitting in the Site-01 lobby. Stains on their armor indicate they have returned from a recent mission.//

**Agent Lang:** I wonder why the Administrator cares so much about hiding his dirty magazines. Like, it //is// 2024. People are a lot cooler about that sort of thing these days.

**Agent Williams:** You know, more importantly, why does he even need a physical stash of them? Like you said, it's 2024, the internet exists.

**Agent Lang:** I mean, isn't the Administrator like 10,000 years old? He probably doesn't know how to use a computer.

**Agent Williams:** Okay, but they haven't had porno mags for 10,000 years, either.

**Agent Lang:** Yeah, but I imagine he got desperate after a while. Imagine how impractical dirty cave paintings probably were.

**Agent Williams:** Did they even have dirty cave paintings back in the day?

**Agent Lang:** You're asking if humans had porn when we were arguably in our most depraved state?

**Agent Williams:** I mean, weren't people too busy trying to stay alive back then? They probably didn't have time.

**Agent Lang:** Never underestimate human degeneracy. They definitely found time.

= **<<End Log>>**

[[/div]]

[[div class="blockquote"]]

= **<<Begin Log>>**

//Drs. Alan Lock and Francis Own are sat within the Site-01 cafeteria eating their lunches.//

**Dr. Lock:** You know, do you ever wonder why the Administrator is always so touchy about **##dda0dd|the tree stump about half a mile west from here in that really clear field which he says he did not use to hide porno mags in but we all remember when O5-1 caught him and the two got into a very public screaming match in the lobby about three months ago which we've talked about pretty much every day since despite O5-3 literally walking into the cafeteria with a gun once and pointing it at all of us until we all said that very long speech that he handwrote for us in unison where we solemnly swore we wouldn't talk about it anymore so its containment isn't hindered##**?

**Dr. Own:** It's a very simple reason, dude. Sex is taboo.

= **<<End Log>>**

[[/div]]

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[[include :scp-wiki:component:license-box]]

> **Filename:** TabooWarningfix.png
> **Author:** [[*user peppersghost]]
> **License:** CC SA-BY 3.0
> **Source Link:** [/taboo SCP Foundation Wiki]
> **Notes:** Edited by [[*user MisterFrown]]

> **Filename:** File:Petworth Park, tree stump - geograph.org.uk - 2964397.jpg
> **Author:** Stephen Craven
> **License:** CC SA-BY 2.0
> **Source Link:** https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Petworth_Park,_tree_stump_-_geograph.org.uk_-_2964397.jpg

[[include :scp-wiki:component:license-box-end]]

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